Will I ever ( hold her in my arms again )

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Hallucination
Member

since 2001-03-18

Posts 419

0 posted 2001-07-05 06:06 AM

It's only been one day and I miss,
her head on my shoulder.
Keep thinking about our last kiss,
I really should have told her.
Now I'm standing behind,
with a closed hand filed with memories.
But I can't keep denying,
the voice deep in me.

This can not be right,
NO, it can't be so, it can not be the end.
I wonder all the time,
will I ever hold, her in my arms again.

three months and fourteen sad days,
since I last saw her eyes.
in every letter I see her face,
telling secrets in the night.
So now I'm sitting here,
with a fist of confrontation in me.
But I gotta stop fearing,
the voice deep in me.

This can not be right,
NO, it can't be so, it can not be the end.
I wonder all the time,
will I ever hold, her in my arms again.

It's only been one day and I miss,
her head on my shoulder.
Keep thinking about our last kiss,
I really should have told her.

This can not be right,
NO, it can't be so, it can not be the end.
I wonder all the time,
will I ever hold, her in my arms again.

zarina
Member

since 2001-05-19

Posts 180

1 posted 2001-07-05 06:17 AM

it's sad... but nice writing. I liked it..

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

2 posted 2001-07-05 08:20 AM

good stuff man I liked it a lot I know that feeling oh so well but what can I say you either get over the girl you get back together of she's stuck on your mind forever. I choose to move on I think lol. anyway I liked the poem and the repetition and the change at the end rocked.

I'm not asking U 2 luv me I'm just letting out the truth no hold barred about what I feel nothing wrong with what I say

branden726

Senior Member

since 2000-09-25

Posts 607
Bay City, MI

3 posted 2001-07-05 10:42 AM

Sad

well ya know it was one of the poems where it hit ya where it counts and gotcha in close. Nice i liked it a lot.

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

4 posted 2001-07-05 10:44 AM

Great work, I really enjoyed the read and I was very drawn in...
Zu

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

5 posted 2001-07-05 11:52 AM

Been there and it hurts. Thanks for this!

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

6 posted 2001-07-05 12:05 PM

I enjoyed this one. I liked the repitition of those 4 lines. It was really great.

*Amanda*
I need more time to find the real me...
to fly like the birds... to be set free.

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

7 posted 2001-07-05 12:13 PM

The pain in this poem is so strong. *hugs* I'm sorry about the situation. It's not an easy one. Heartbreak is all over in PIP these days. I really enjoyed the poem, the lines, "Now I'm standing behind,/with a closed hand filled with memories" were my favorite. Nicely done.

--Marie

You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds.

JBaker515

Member

since 2001-02-28

Posts 458
Dartmouth College

8 posted 2001-07-05 12:16 PM

sad it is..
but great thoughts...words were perfect i guess??
loved it..
just keep ur head up, and everything will be ok!!
I promise!

$ Jeff $ : )

"If I'm not back in 5 minutes......just wait longer!"

"You may take our lives, but you'll never take our FREEDOM!

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

9 posted 2001-07-05 12:24 PM

I agree with Marie. Those were my favorite lines also.
Such a sad poem. VERY Nicely written. It kept my attention.

Suga_Baby
Member

since 2000-08-06

Posts 380
Maine, USA

10 posted 2001-07-05 07:17 PM

This is AWESOME! It's something I can relate to, a separation feeling so wrong, being together feeling so RIGHT, yet not knowing if it will ever be RIGHT again...

,
Suga

"A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep."

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

11 posted 2001-07-06 02:14 AM

sad...and you written it very nicely...i enjoyed the read.

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

12 posted 2001-07-06 03:05 AM

This poem is very sad and I can totally realate to it keep up the awsome work.
Lauren

Shygirl82
Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 245
Ilinois

13 posted 2001-07-06 03:24 AM

This was really quite sad but still very beautiful...I liked it alot..hope the situation gets better soon
~Nikki~

It takes only a minute to like someone, a hour to love someone, but a lifetime to forget them.

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

14 posted 2001-07-06 04:07 PM

that was an awesome but sad poem. nothing more to say......

~sugarpie313~
Member

since 2000-09-14

Posts 375
Maine, USA

15 posted 2001-07-06 06:30 PM

this one was really good. the repitition was perfect. great write

Valerie

"...And i want to take you down, but your soul could not be found, doesn't matter much you see cause your disease is killing me..." -Saliva

fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

16 posted 2001-07-07 12:56 PM

hey dude that is so sad, let me buy you a few rounds(root beer of couse

):pats on back: you'll make it. Just keep hoping. Nice poem I like it. Seems like it would make a good song

"and Death i think is no paranthesis"-e.e. cummings

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

17 posted 2001-07-08 02:22 AM

I enjoyed this one here. Well done!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

18 posted 2001-07-08 02:07 PM

this was so sad. i can relate this so much. the poem was great. i loved it.

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

19 posted 2001-07-13 10:13 AM

Everyone seems to be in a depressed situation.
Thanks for the beautiful read.
keep sharing

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare

DancinQueen

Senior Member

since 2000-07-29

Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA

20 posted 2001-07-14 02:03 AM

sad

im sorry, but you're young, keep your eyes forward on the future and not the past. keep posting

*dq

**You can't always trust the people you want to**

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

21 posted 2001-07-15 03:19 AM

Ouch...well the thing you have to remember is that we draw strength from our experiences. Keep your head up and I hope all goes well with you.

~AF~

Psychopathic chickens are plotting against me...

thedarkangel
Member

since 2001-05-12

Posts 74
~*~the cutest~*~

22 posted 2001-07-16 10:01 AM

i really liekd this poem, do u reckon it could be made into a song?! sorry songwriter here just tryin to tell the difference! anyway great work!i really enjoyed this poem!
laura
~*~

Be honest and don't follow fads and fashion. do what you do and do it well ~*~jon bon jovi~*~

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

23 posted 2001-07-19 11:58 PM

This can not be right,
NO, it can't be so, it can not be the end.
I wonder all the time,
will I ever hold, her in my arms again.

i loved this last stanza....as with most of your work i love your flow..it was great thanks for sharing

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