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| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Together |
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NathanS Member
since 2001-09-27
Posts 106CA |
Meh... im sure this write isn't very good... i wrote it up in attempt at something else- but since most people like my work then i myself do, i thought id post it. Together Through the night Glistened so bright The moon of light Through the night Shined that love Shown from above Through the night Will i fight For the one i care Through the night With all our might Will we remain together Now and forever, Will we remain together -Nathan [This message has been edited by NathanS (edited 10-03-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 NathanS - All Rights Reserved | |||
Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
You shown your emotions really well very sweet and assuring thanks for sharing keep it up hi Sweets, Lizzy, Jesa, Ina, Allysa, Marie, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Chelsea, Baker, Leah, Jess, Kimmie |
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AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
Actually I think this is pretty good, but could I suggest changing "stick" to "remain" or something of the sort? I don't know why, just thought it might sound better, who knows.  |
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HopelessRomanticGuy Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 495LI, New York |
I dunno, I liked this one alot, I'm considering sending it to someone. It's just fine the way it is. |
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NathanS Member
since 2001-09-27
Posts 106CA |
Thanks for the advice on the "stick" to "remain" - as you can see i took that into concideration. As for the person that wants to send it to a friend, feel free to. What good is poetry if it can only be read and never distributed? Enjoy -Nathan |
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