Teen Poetry #5 |
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Awaiting |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
she wept for the love that never seemed to show she wanted it all to be such a perfect dream of life she didnt understand that it couldnt be everlasting she tried so hard for naught and lost her sense of self she longed for her true heart to come and sweep her away she passed up all the flaws that could have made her whole she couldnt see pass the blemishes that are what makes life unigue she awaits for the dream of hers that will never show it self “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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© Copyright 2001 Tiffany Durham - All Rights Reserved | |||
pure_innocence Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 80Colorado, US |
I liked it. Lookung for what can never truly exist, perfection. Beautiful write! |
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Zukene_Chic Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 152Cali |
I'm not quite sure why I liked this, but I did. |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
I liked the whole idea of this poem and how you expressed it all..i thought it was a really good poem..nice job ![]() |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Tiff --- I love this piece. You have expressed you sentiments on this freely and whole heartedly. Beautiful poem. Hope things work out. Thanks for the wonderful read. hi Sweets ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
Impressive writing here. You've got a good form going here with your iambic beat and your four-line stanzas. The story told in this poem is well presented. Your wording - especially the way you use the word blemishes to express the things that make life unique. It is a shame that we humans have not been taught the lesson in this poem enough. Good job and keep writing. "If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh" |
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BlackDove Junior Member
since 2001-10-14
Posts 18Why are you reading this??? |
Hey Hey Tifferoke! Guess who! Nice Post ![]() All the plastic people who live without a care.Try to sit around my table and never bring a chair... |
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never_a_princess Member
since 2001-06-09
Posts 82Show Me the Money |
Tifferage! *liked this a lot* Nice point of view and rockin' choice of words. I also love your first signature thing; the one about choices! The "Choice" so many people talk about today ruins more than just one destiny. *nods* Anyways, good poem hun! __o0o_Anna_o0o__ *waves* Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly. |
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anonymous albert ?![]()
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
the expression was nicley protrayed, Tiff ![]() =) |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
she awaits for the dream of hers that will never show it self Tiffers! ![]() ![]() ![]() see the glass crack like a flower opening |
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