Open Poetry #14 |
Composure? |
snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
flittingly dancing about, it leaves the impression of its intent to maintain false, yet tantalizing, reserve, and not to give me that satisfaction... I’ve got it in my feet to flee, but my heart doesn’t possess such control... the torrent continues its mission to escort me to recklessness, while I am consistently led by stray cyclones. anchored by change, my attempts at the unrealistic are confirmed in the ardent rhetoric of the unbridled streams... my crack at swimming against the undercurrent is thwarted by the jeers of the smoothly sailing leaves and the allure of the downstream-bound rivulet... wavering between the easiness of surrender and the gratification of enduring affliction, my restraint dangles on a thinning strand... my aloof decisiveness aids me in reaching the limits of sanity, and, just as I’ve mustered all stamina from my depths, I turn around to catch your air... -kh 07/03/01 it was love that first drew me, |
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SmittenKitten Senior Member
since 2001-06-20
Posts 1131where the sky and horizon meet |
my crack at swimming against the undercurrent is thwarted by the jeers of the smoothly sailing leaves and the allure of the downstream-bound rivulet... I love your imagery! Great poem ~Krista [This message has been edited by SmittenKitten (edited 07-03-2001).] |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Kris, Hey sweetie! first off good to see you here...secondly your poem, oh my wowowow im really impressed now! you've taken your talent to new heights with this one. awesome imagery...this last stanza WOW "wavering between the easiness of surrender and the gratification of enduring affliction, my restraint dangles on a thinning strand... my aloof decisiveness aids me in reaching the limits of sanity, and, just as I’ve mustered all stamina from my depths, I turn around to catch your air..." How cool is that? Very!!! Take care. I'll be in touch soon, promise Aims ~~~~~~ "but i see your true colors, |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
my attempts at the unrealistic are confirmed in the ardent rhetoric of the unbridled streams... my crack at swimming against the undercurrent is thwarted by the jeers of the smoothly sailing leaves and the allure of the downstream-bound rivulet... wavering between the easiness of surrender and the gratification of enduring affliction, my restraint dangles on a thinning strand... my aloof decisiveness aids me in reaching the limits of sanity, and, just as I’ve mustered all stamina from my depths, I turn around to catch your air... ==================================== UMMM wheres the rhyme??? JUST KIDDING this dont need no rhyme...its damn fine with out it.... "in the ardent rhetoric of the unbridled streams..." WHEW...way cool image and metaphor.... and that last line...poetry in motion me girlie.. yeah... sometimes being downwind is a good thing *L* very well written and intense writing K... so many images and cool lines of expression dressed up in natures groovies well done poetess flakebooty later me We're all feeding our lonely like it might go away, |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
always enjoy your words so much |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
very few can pull images like you can sp. . . this is just another reason why. . . excellent. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
Krista: thank you! I am happy you liked this! Aims: hey girlie...thank you...you are always too nice to me...I am glad you enjoyed this, and it's great to see ya! -e ~~~~~ JM: woooo...you're startin' to sound like SOMEBODY else I know...hehe... ...nature's groovies, eh ...I like that one...have to remember that! Thanks, m'friend...you're too kind! Kathleen: thanks, my friend, for your continual support of my writing! I truly appreciate your replies! Sven: thanks so much for the kind reply! I am happy you enjoyed! sp it was love that first drew me, |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
Saving this to read over and over! |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Wonderful lines.... "wavering between the easiness of surrender and the gratification of enduring affliction, my restraint dangles on a thinning strand... my aloof decisiveness aids me in reaching the limits of sanity, and, just as I’ve mustered all stamina from my depths, I turn around to catch your air..." Beautifully written internal conflict! |
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