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Open Poetry #14
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Just Say
| Open Poetry #14 |
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Just Say |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL 
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When the rains came and washed away, the sure calamity of your love, you sputtered and coughed on your mistake, like a choked child crying out for help. But when my tears came you didn't need them, and I could tell. All the while you were somewhere else, at the same time, trying to get back some desperate knowledge, of how love was supposed to be. All the while you didn't really love me at all. Don't you see that NOW? There is no question that we shared passion, and drank together from the cup of lonliness, for some short while, but now when there is nothing but a drop left, I believe we are both turning away. Don't you see, that the winds wasted their time on our whispers, because the moments we needed were never to last? "I love you" We breathed and fell into each other in such ways, that would make the moon and night time sky jealous. Zealously, we labored to feast on one another, but there were times when the moments weren't enough, and the impossibilities were raging too much against the speed of our friendship. Like an 80 mph plummet down the silky black highway of pain, the tension continued to pick up. And then one day I stopped to see your rainbow had faded, as all rainbows do. Now I'm climbing back out, and staring me in the face in yet another doorway. Will I walk through? If I walk through, will I the same impossible grasp of love, I've suffered twice from already? Don't you see NOW? Shhhh... You didn't love me like you thought you did. and now I know that. still d-i-s-c-o-n-n-e-c-t-e-d |
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| © Copyright 2001 Jennifer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Oh my...Jennifer, this is a very powerful write. You've done well with this one. I'm glad to see you posting again.  Michael Michael Auguste~ |
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Always remember, gentle one, there are always different kinds and meanings of love. You explore deeply, and examine closely, and that is good, but don't turn your back on your feelings and become brittle..Very nicely done, which, of course I would have expected as all of yours are...gentle smile |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Jenn, never an easy realization to come to by any means. Yet, through pain and sorrow comes the blessing of freedom and peace. They will be yours in time. Powerful work here. All writing comes |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Wow Jenn, what a powerful poem, and I am sure many can identify with your writing of the realization of "it's over!", fantastic writing, this is a keeper! "Lose your temper and you lose a friend; lie and you lose yourself." |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Painful to read, doubtless more so to write. Ah! But tomorrow! "Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to decieve" |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Wonderful emotional outpouring and the hurt is oozing through all the words and lines....Masterfully written! "the sure calamity of your love," That must have hurt to think and write.... I have to say on the other hand....You kids are complicated these days.....I hope you find the love you need. |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
but. . .perhaps they did. . . just not now. . .  a heartfelt and deeply moving piece. . . ------------------------------------------------------------ To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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