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Mabel A. Dilley
Senior Member

since 2001-03-17

Posts 859
Seattle, WA, USA

0 posted 2001-05-22 01:46 PM

morning stands quietly
radiant reflections please
the sky is happy

"I am not now that which I have been."

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

1 posted 2001-05-22 01:55 PM

Very good Haiku. Might want to shorten first line a tad. More!

Live for love. Without love, you don't live.

[This message has been edited by Interloper (edited 05-22-2001).]

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

2 posted 2001-05-22 02:22 PM

Yes indeed, suggestion: remove the 'ly' from quietly, then it would be correct.

Like it though, nice picture too

Titia

Mabel A. Dilley
Senior Member

since 2001-03-17

Posts 859
Seattle, WA, USA

3 posted 2001-05-22 02:47 PM

Darn!! And I thought I had counted better than that. Thanks for catching that.

"I am not now that which I have been."

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

4 posted 2001-05-22 03:54 PM

Well, I for one believe the sky does have emotion, it certainly seems angry during a thunderstorm!

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

5 posted 2001-05-23 03:36 PM

Wow, this is so beautiful....great work!!

Nathan

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

6 posted 2001-05-23 08:20 PM

that's why I count the syllables. . . lol. . . it's the only way that I can be sure that I don't miss one. . .

great job Julian. . .

---------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2004-05-21 01:44 PM

gorgeous!

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

8 posted 2005-11-17 02:19 PM

Mabel~

Wishing for return
Of poetic lines of you
Come on, make my day~

*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*No matter what I search for ...
let me know when it is LOVE that I find*~ <))><

Email - [email protected]

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