Open Poetry #14 |
Insecurity's Song |
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
It’s dark outside… And inside too… Won’t you lean a bit closer as I whisper words to you? That’s it…Closer still, For the things I will say Are spoken for your heart It’s much better done that way. Let the Shadows slowly seep Into the fabric of your life, As they carry with them The struggle and the strife. I love the way they trouble you and a quiet mind do cloud, For darkness is my habitat Shadows just my shroud Join me in this journey And embrace the flow of tears, Take my hand as I lead you Into this land of fears |
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© Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
casting about insecurities....a good, frightening read.... |
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IWithinYou Junior Member
since 2001-06-14
Posts 21Within You |
Ah..........very very well done. Insecurity does tempt just so. The syrup runs thickly to cover all. |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
Cpat...i know this place well...helen |
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MyEnchanted_Melody Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be. |
love the way they trouble you and a quiet mind do cloud, For darkness is my habitat Shadows just my shroud Join me in this journey And embrace the flow of tears, Take my hand as I lead you Into this land of fears ---------------------- oh......what an invitation? and what a journey? I doubt that anyone hasn't been there or had a taste of it.......... Thank you ************************** It's only me.......only me |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
wow...gotta say I have enjoyed reading you today.....this is done with tenderness and an understanding of the weakness that plague us all...well most of us anyway.....guess there are a few who deny insecurities |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
i love how you drew me closer o yuh |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
A bit scary, nails the way our fears are all consuming. One tiny nit: "and a quiet mind do cloud," should that be "does" - for singular "a quiet mind?" Corinne |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Thanks to everyone for the comments!!! Corrine... you may be right..I was using do instead of does with the idea it wasn't refering to the singular mind but to refer to the "They" as plural... they do trouble they do cloud.... I love the way they trouble you and a quiet mind do cloud, For darkness is my habitat Shadows just my shroud my grammer is not the best ...so now i'll have to do some research and see if I can't understand how it should actually be. I appreciate the comment and welcome future ones!!! |
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