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Open Poetry #14
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Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan

0 posted 2001-06-12 06:13 PM




~I'll Never Hurt You~

You were the one that knew
where I kept my heart
You knew how I was put together
and how I came apart

You knew my deepest fears
Each one by miserable name
You knew where they lived
and from what nightmare they came

You knew what caused my tears
to fall like blackened rain
You knew the words that hurt the most
Like acid shot into the vein

You knew my secret dreams
and fragile fantasies
You knew how tenderly I planted them
hidden from harsh realities

Now our time as one is through
and separately we live
I never guessed you’d be the one
with the deepest pain to give

The line of love and hate
has been erased by sands of time
The inner demons have been released
yours...as well as mine

Together we’ve reached the end
the closure of forever
Forgotten in the yesterdays
now lay the words “I’ll never....”



[This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 06-12-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Butterflies_dont_cry - All Rights Reserved
snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
1 posted 2001-06-12 06:48 PM


'You were the one that knew
where I kept my heart
You knew how I was put together
and how I came apart

You knew my deepest fears
Each one by miserable name
You knew where they lived
and from what nightmare they came'

I really like this, butterflies...great rhymes and flow...very cool graphic, too...

sp  

I hopelessly, helplessly, wonder why
Everything gotta change around me
I’d tell it to your face,
But you lost your face along the way...

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2001-06-12 07:44 PM


I never guessed you’d be the one
with the deepest pain to give

The line of love and hate
has been erased by sands of time

The inner demons have been released
yours...as well as mine

Together we’ve reached the end
the closure of forever
Forgotten in the yesterdays
now lay the words “I’ll never....”
=====================================

this one just aches baby..with your gift to choose the exact phrases and images that define the way it cuts deep....

"You knew what caused my tears
to fall like blackened rain
You knew the words that hurt the most
Like acid shot into the vein"


like i said...deep...
like fingernails digging in already burned skin..
or scraping across a chalkboard...
you always could purge the phrases/emotions so that we feel em....

where does the patience and kind compassion go...
like they say...thin line between....yayaya
write it out...let it go...
loveya  girlie
me

she said I dont know why you ever would lie to me
like I'm a little untrusting when I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya
~MB20~

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
3 posted 2001-06-12 07:50 PM


Wow, this one says so much in it my sweet friend.  It hurts to read it.  The line between love and hate is very thin indeed.  Sometimes we cross over without even realizing it.  Once you make the transition, you usually can't go back.  Those who know us best can hurt us deepest because they know our weaknesses as well as our strengths.  I see strength in here, a little regret, truth, courage, and most of all your heart shining through.  May God bless you and bring you the happiness you deserve. Take care, my dear friend.  **HUGS** your way.  

All writing comes
by the grace of God.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Watersign6
Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823
Hurricane,WV
4 posted 2001-06-12 08:13 PM


this is really great it flows and says so much  
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
5 posted 2001-06-12 08:22 PM


totally heartfelt and full of powerful emotions. . . this says a lot. . .

excellent. . .

---------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Mother_Earth
Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 1370
1/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan
6 posted 2001-06-12 10:36 PM


My Butterfly kid, they know just the right spot to hurt the most. A word, a look, a sigh, all at their time.  No one can take the hurts away, but with time YOU get strong enough to endure.  I am proud of you, my kid and know , even with bruses, you will make it.  Love and hugs,  Mom
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
7 posted 2001-06-13 07:36 AM


ButterfliesDC~

'You were the one that knew
where I kept my heart
You knew how I was put together
and how I came apart'


Such tenderly emoted emotions flow through this entire piece.
Just lovely, sweet poet.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
                               noles1@totcon.com             

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
8 posted 2001-06-13 08:17 AM


how beautiful and gentle flows your poem. excellent heartfelt piece.

Charisma

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2001-06-13 08:23 AM


Some very good lines in this...and the flow is great! Enjoyed !!
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
10 posted 2001-06-13 08:31 AM


B_dc ...I have never really gotten to know you other than your words on here...I am glad to be reading you again.  Similarities in life, from what I can tell by words alone. I have lived that fine line...and  I think once I forgave, well at least to the point of caring, I don't feel the pain any longer...a loss yes of years of sharing, a lifetime together...and maybe  fear of loneliness, but the hating is gone forever.
And surprised, I am. ~~sighing~~ as I felt every word, deeply. You write as well as ever.

~Wynter/Maureen

"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II



sans38
Member
since 2001-03-03
Posts 117
Westland, Michigan
11 posted 2001-06-13 08:37 AM


This was very beautiful!
JLR
Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785

12 posted 2001-06-13 09:32 AM


I resisted reading this...because never is a long time and I knew how it would end.  Nonetheless, there is a comfort of resolve I hadn't expected.  Well done!  
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
13 posted 2001-06-13 10:45 AM


enjoy
Gemini
Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203
Wisconsin, USA
14 posted 2001-06-13 02:26 PM


This read so bittersweet, yet brought forth the reality of closure.  Thank you for this read, I think you gave me my own sense of closure that I've been needing to hear. Very nicely done.
EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
15 posted 2001-06-13 04:54 PM


Wow! This one just gets better with every read my friend. You already know how I feel about this one so I'll just say well done, excellent work. Take care!

"Friends are quiet angels who lift us to our
feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly." ~unknown


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
16 posted 2001-06-13 05:04 PM


Great poem!   It's funny how we change and things go wrong...even after all that time... but a part of it always hangs on to the inner solace of our soul where we reflect on all those thing and even marvel at the course it took......I'll Never Hurt You .......is a great title!

The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up
spaces of consciousness and resistance; to language oppressions; to
re-language historie

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
17 posted 2001-06-23 08:08 PM


Holly-
   playing catch-up here, and
   i'm so glad i came across
   this beautiful write..
   you've penned such a deeply
   emotional piece here, and
   you've done it wonderfully..

   hugs,
   ~vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his
heart, you have not truely met the poet."
-vlraynes



Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
18 posted 2001-06-23 08:24 PM


I owe you one Vicky...shame on me for not doing the thank you's on this....so thank you first!

SP~ Thank you for the kind read.

LW~ Strength comes through pain...just a pity that love has to turn into hate...*sigh* Thank you my friend~

Watersign~ I truly appreciate your words, thank you.

Sven~ It came after feeling alot...thank you for your kind words.

Mom~ The bruises are the kind you can see so no one knows it hurts unless I show it right   Love you~

Marge~ You speak like a mother...thank you so much for your tender gentle words~

Charisma~ From the bottom of my heart I thank you~

Cpat~ I'm glad you found some parts to enjoy, many thanks to you.

Maureen~ Such a beautiful reply...I'm honored, thank you so much~

sans~ Thank you very much for reading.

JLR~ Sometimes...yes there is comfort in finality...thank you very much for your kind reply~

vandana~ Thank you~

Gemini~ I'm so glad I could bring some comfort to you, thank you for letting me know~

Eagle~ Awe sweet one...you know your words touch me...thank you my friend~

ethome~ I look forward to your replies so much...they show me what you truly see in the poetry...it means so very much.

Vicky~ Thank you again...it's an honor to have you read my work, welcome back!


Logan
Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641
Arkansas
19 posted 2001-06-24 12:04 PM


We leave ourselves so vulnerable in the name of love, ahh, sigh, very nice read though, gives for pondering...gentle smile
Blackdrake
Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 83
Depends on the day :)
20 posted 2001-06-24 02:48 AM


This opens ones mind ...

   thank you .  

Mysterious is the shadow, walking down the path of light.  ~~ ¥ ~~



Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
21 posted 2001-06-24 06:56 AM


Oh Butterflies, I'm so sorry I missed this earlier. An amazingly emotion-filled write ... you've captured the essence of this ache so vividly, truly a heartening read.

Best wishes and hugs,
/Kit

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
22 posted 2001-06-24 08:07 PM


Logan~ Thank you for such a kind read, I sincerely appreciate it~

BD~ Thank you for your reply and so glad I gave you something to ponder~

Kit~ No apologies needed my friend, Thank you so much for gracing my poetry with your reply~

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
23 posted 2001-06-25 09:41 AM


holly

#1 i apologise for my slackness
in responding these days! life
gets crazy...
but more importantly this was
awesome...loving and then losing
is hard, but as always you write
your pain with such elegance and
grace. i have missed your words on
these pages of blue! i shall be dropping
you an email soon. take care till then.

love ya.
amy  

"but i see your true colors,
shining through...
i see your true colors
and that's why i love you"
~phil collins~

illusion
Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 296

24 posted 2001-06-25 12:14 PM


This is heartbreaking. It makes it so hard to trust anyone when the one we've trusted with everything shows that their concept of "I'll never" only means "until I need to." Beautifully written.
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
25 posted 2001-06-25 01:33 PM


I don't know how I missed this!  You have captured what every person feels when a relationship sours, and goes beyond the boundaries of fair anymore, and you really did it to perfection. Extremely well done, and some of your lines cut like a knife to the core of an aching heart that I am sure we have all felt one time or another.  Well done!

"Lose your temper and you lose a friend; lie and you lose yourself."
~ Hopi ~

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
26 posted 2001-06-29 12:48 PM


This brings a tear to my eye and memories alike... Painful times, take care.  {{{{{{{{HUGZ}}}}}}}}}}

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
27 posted 2001-06-29 12:52 PM


                                      "the line of love and hate
                                  has been erased by sands of time
                                 The inner demons have been released
                                      yours...as well as mine

                                   Together we’ve reached the end
                                       the closure of forever
                                     Forgotten in the yesterdays
                                   now lay the words “I’ll never....”

Ouch!  that hurt to read!   I don't know what to say to such a poem of such misplaced passion. It's fabulous writing I will say!

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