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Open Poetry #14
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I'll Never Hurt You
| Open Poetry #14 |
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I'll Never Hurt You |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
 ~I'll Never Hurt You~ You were the one that knew where I kept my heart You knew how I was put together and how I came apart You knew my deepest fears Each one by miserable name You knew where they lived and from what nightmare they came You knew what caused my tears to fall like blackened rain You knew the words that hurt the most Like acid shot into the vein You knew my secret dreams and fragile fantasies You knew how tenderly I planted them hidden from harsh realities Now our time as one is through and separately we live I never guessed you’d be the one with the deepest pain to give The line of love and hate has been erased by sands of time The inner demons have been released yours...as well as mine Together we’ve reached the end the closure of forever Forgotten in the yesterdays now lay the words “I’ll never....” [This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 06-12-2001).] |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
'You were the one that knew where I kept my heart You knew how I was put together and how I came apart You knew my deepest fears Each one by miserable name You knew where they lived and from what nightmare they came' I really like this, butterflies...great rhymes and flow...very cool graphic, too... sp  I hopelessly, helplessly, wonder why |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I never guessed you’d be the one with the deepest pain to give The line of love and hate has been erased by sands of time The inner demons have been released yours...as well as mine Together we’ve reached the end the closure of forever Forgotten in the yesterdays now lay the words “I’ll never....” ===================================== this one just aches baby..with your gift to choose the exact phrases and images that define the way it cuts deep.... "You knew what caused my tears to fall like blackened rain You knew the words that hurt the most Like acid shot into the vein" like i said...deep... like fingernails digging in already burned skin.. or scraping across a chalkboard... you always could purge the phrases/emotions so that we feel em.... where does the patience and kind compassion go... like they say...thin line between....yayaya write it out...let it go... loveya girlie me she said I dont know why you ever would lie to me |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Wow, this one says so much in it my sweet friend. It hurts to read it. The line between love and hate is very thin indeed. Sometimes we cross over without even realizing it. Once you make the transition, you usually can't go back. Those who know us best can hurt us deepest because they know our weaknesses as well as our strengths. I see strength in here, a little regret, truth, courage, and most of all your heart shining through. May God bless you and bring you the happiness you deserve. Take care, my dear friend. **HUGS** your way.  All writing comes |
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Watersign6 Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823Hurricane,WV |
this is really great it flows and says so much  |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
totally heartfelt and full of powerful emotions. . . this says a lot. . . excellent. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Mother_Earth Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 13701/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan |
My Butterfly kid, they know just the right spot to hurt the most. A word, a look, a sigh, all at their time. No one can take the hurts away, but with time YOU get strong enough to endure. I am proud of you, my kid and know , even with bruses, you will make it. Love and hugs, Mom |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ButterfliesDC~ 'You were the one that knew where I kept my heart You knew how I was put together and how I came apart' Such tenderly emoted emotions flow through this entire piece. Just lovely, sweet poet. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
how beautiful and gentle flows your poem. excellent heartfelt piece. Charisma |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Some very good lines in this...and the flow is great! Enjoyed !! |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
B_dc ...I have never really gotten to know you other than your words on here...I am glad to be reading you again. Similarities in life, from what I can tell by words alone. I have lived that fine line...and I think once I forgave, well at least to the point of caring, I don't feel the pain any longer...a loss yes of years of sharing, a lifetime together...and maybe fear of loneliness, but the hating is gone forever. And surprised, I am. ~~sighing~~ as I felt every word, deeply. You write as well as ever. ~Wynter/Maureen "The worst prison would be a closed heart". |
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sans38 Member
since 2001-03-03
Posts 117Westland, Michigan |
This was very beautiful! |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
I resisted reading this...because never is a long time and I knew how it would end. Nonetheless, there is a comfort of resolve I hadn't expected. Well done! |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoy |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
This read so bittersweet, yet brought forth the reality of closure. Thank you for this read, I think you gave me my own sense of closure that I've been needing to hear. Very nicely done. |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Wow! This one just gets better with every read my friend. You already know how I feel about this one so I'll just say well done, excellent work. Take care! "Friends are quiet angels who lift us to our |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Great poem! It's funny how we change and things go wrong...even after all that time... but a part of it always hangs on to the inner solace of our soul where we reflect on all those thing and even marvel at the course it took......I'll Never Hurt You .......is a great title! The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Holly- playing catch-up here, and i'm so glad i came across this beautiful write.. you've penned such a deeply emotional piece here, and you've done it wonderfully.. hugs, ~vicky "...until you have read the verse on his |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
I owe you one Vicky...shame on me for not doing the thank you's on this....so thank you first! SP~ Thank you for the kind read. LW~ Strength comes through pain...just a pity that love has to turn into hate...*sigh* Thank you my friend~ Watersign~ I truly appreciate your words, thank you. Sven~ It came after feeling alot...thank you for your kind words. Mom~ The bruises are the kind you can see so no one knows it hurts unless I show it right Love you~Marge~ You speak like a mother...thank you so much for your tender gentle words~ Charisma~ From the bottom of my heart I thank you~ Cpat~ I'm glad you found some parts to enjoy, many thanks to you. Maureen~ Such a beautiful reply...I'm honored, thank you so much~ sans~ Thank you very much for reading. JLR~ Sometimes...yes there is comfort in finality...thank you very much for your kind reply~ vandana~ Thank you~ Gemini~ I'm so glad I could bring some comfort to you, thank you for letting me know~ Eagle~ Awe sweet one...you know your words touch me...thank you my friend~ ethome~ I look forward to your replies so much...they show me what you truly see in the poetry...it means so very much. Vicky~ Thank you again...it's an honor to have you read my work, welcome back! |
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
We leave ourselves so vulnerable in the name of love, ahh, sigh, very nice read though, gives for pondering...gentle smile |
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Blackdrake Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 83Depends on the day :) |
This opens ones mind ... thank you . Mysterious is the shadow, walking down the path of light. ~~ ¥ ~~ |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Oh Butterflies, I'm so sorry I missed this earlier. An amazingly emotion-filled write ... you've captured the essence of this ache so vividly, truly a heartening read. Best wishes and hugs, /Kit |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Logan~ Thank you for such a kind read, I sincerely appreciate it~ BD~ Thank you for your reply and so glad I gave you something to ponder~ Kit~ No apologies needed my friend, Thank you so much for gracing my poetry with your reply~ |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
holly #1 i apologise for my slackness in responding these days! life gets crazy... but more importantly this was awesome...loving and then losing is hard, but as always you write your pain with such elegance and grace. i have missed your words on these pages of blue! i shall be dropping you an email soon. take care till then. love ya. amy "but i see your true colors, |
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illusion Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 296 |
This is heartbreaking. It makes it so hard to trust anyone when the one we've trusted with everything shows that their concept of "I'll never" only means "until I need to." Beautifully written. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I don't know how I missed this! You have captured what every person feels when a relationship sours, and goes beyond the boundaries of fair anymore, and you really did it to perfection. Extremely well done, and some of your lines cut like a knife to the core of an aching heart that I am sure we have all felt one time or another. Well done! "Lose your temper and you lose a friend; lie and you lose yourself." |
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ThUnDeRkYsS Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727Wisconsin |
This brings a tear to my eye and memories alike... Painful times, take care. {{{{{{{{HUGZ}}}}}}}}}} Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
"the line of love and hate has been erased by sands of time The inner demons have been released yours...as well as mine Together we’ve reached the end the closure of forever Forgotten in the yesterdays now lay the words “I’ll never....” Ouch! that hurt to read! I don't know what to say to such a poem of such misplaced passion. It's fabulous writing I will say! |
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