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Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

0 posted 2001-05-21 12:28 PM

Senses alert
Nerves raw with strain
Mind racing ahead
                         of feet
Heel and toe
Eyes in constant movement
The human body a miracle
                        of coordination

Listening for alien sounds
Looking for the “out of place”
Feeling with booted sole
                        the path

How to learn all of this
At only 18 years of age
Better learn if you want to see
                        the 19th

[This message has been edited by Interloper (edited 05-22-2001).]

joycerogers
Member

since 2001-05-16

Posts 83
Texas

1 posted 2001-05-21 12:48 PM

A different twist.
I really like this.

The essences of all that is important in life...starts with you.

- Joyce Rogers

NapalmsConstantlyConfused

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 529

2 posted 2001-05-21 12:49 PM

i say, as would anyone else who's ever been on a foot patrol in hostile territory, Oh, so true.... and what a way to say it too... very good write

-Napalm

I Love The Smell Of Napalm In The AM!
"Why do i smell something burning?!?"
I Love The Smell Of Napalm In The AM!

RMW
Senior Member

since 2001-03-21

Posts 1424

3 posted 2001-05-21 01:21 PM

Excellent.

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

4 posted 2001-05-21 05:58 PM

I've been on patrol and yes, you've expressed it well. Thanks

Michael

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

Alan
Senior Member

since 2000-09-12

Posts 1499
right next door

5 posted 2001-05-21 07:33 PM

I have never been on patrol..but this sounds like what I have to do when I go to the mall on weekends. I liked your work...good job

Lady In White

Member Elite

since 2001-02-12

Posts 2799
USA

6 posted 2001-05-22 10:39 AM

Sir, should "is" in the last line be "if"...

and while you write this in the time of time not so distant....

it does not take much imagination to put this back one hundred years....

and be much the same as then, now....

well done Sir....

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

7 posted 2001-05-22 12:10 PM

joycerogers ~ Thanx for the read.

NCC ~ Amen

Bob ~ Thanks

Auguste ~ Thanks

Alan ~ Thanx

Lady ~ Thanx for noting the typo. Sumpin' those guys missed

Live for love. Without love, you don't live.

Mabel A. Dilley
Senior Member

since 2001-03-17

Posts 859
Seattle, WA, USA

8 posted 2001-05-22 09:56 PM

Well expressed Enjoyed the read.

"I am not now that which I have been."

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant

since 2000-06-17

Posts 5546
missouri

9 posted 2001-05-23 01:41 AM

As a woman this is not something I ever had to experience...but I felt every word...every hesitant step...

Watersign6
Senior Member

since 2001-05-25

Posts 823
Hurricane,WV

10 posted 2001-06-05 07:42 PM

another enjoyable one from you-yippee!

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

11 posted 2001-06-05 07:47 PM

wow.....this is really good my friend

Logan
Senior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 1641
Arkansas

12 posted 2001-06-05 08:02 PM

Sweat in the eyes, fear in the guts, scared to wipe as movement is too easily seen, hands tight, knuckles white, and a prayer, one more day...yes

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

13 posted 2001-06-06 08:55 AM

Julian ~ Thank you.

Paula ~ Then I could ask no more.

Watersign6 ~ Three cheers for your support

SEA ~ I really appreciate you, friend.

Logan ~ Ah, a comrade in arms. Yes, indeed.

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. Philip Sidney (1554-1586) Loving in Truth

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