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She Lets it Pour all Over Her
| Open Poetry #13 |
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She Lets it Pour all Over Her |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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She Lets it Pour all over Her Laughter was like hot confetti spilling from the sun into the grass. She could feel it bubble from her throat and burst there into summer. The hose was the season’s best toy, the conduit of joy snaked across the patio drenching the cement to cool, then into pails where she sat like a queen with a crown of wet curls. Behind her the sheets waved on the line and her mother hummed into a book, and even her brother bounced into a smile when he captured the waterfall and let it pour all over her. Now the girl is woman turning toward summer’s remarkable with her pails still full and overflowing with cool. That is the way she makes it past those days that dare to question, those days that stick to her like a sagging bathing suit, she lets it pour all over her. In the dew of little things, |
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| © Copyright 2001 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Umhumm....yep....you go girl! |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
Dear Lady, your imagery is specific and very effective. I won't critique this, just enoy it, it's fabulous! Kathleen Blake |
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Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Martie, Just enough imagery to turn this one into magic. Wonderful, my friend...and nice :-) Michael Proust- |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Martie~ And I just got the cutest picture of that little moppet in her sagging bathing suit.  Oh ... if ever I wanted to 'share'... ADORABLE ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Oh I loved this Martie, just loved it! I remember those days so well, and wonder where has the child in all of us gone...I say we all have hose fights as soon as the weather allows, what do you think? Boy girl, can you paint a poetic picture like no body's business, you're the best! ~*~A poet is someone who reads more than they write ~*~ |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Laughter was like hot confetti spilling from the sun =================== where she sat like a queen with a crown of wet curls. Behind her the sheets waved on the line and her mother hummed into a book, and even her brother bounced into a smile when he captured the waterfall and let it pour all over her. Now the girl is woman turning toward summer’s remarkable with her pails still full and overflowing with cool. That is the way she makes it past those days that dare to question, those days that stick to her like a sagging bathing suit, she lets it pour all over her. ============================ this is a smile waiting to happen... youre so cool!!! the imagery in this is so well presented and the depth of the discoveries made in the memory is very cool..... "That is the way she makes it past those days that dare to question, those days that stick to her like a sagging bathing suit," yes....very cool indeed... that verse is pure Martie poetry. oh you speak to me in riddles |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
I really enjoyed this wonderfully descriptive vision Martie ... a wonderful read!  Best wishes, /Kit |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
I love this! Those summers on the patio. Thanks for the memory. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sunshine--when it shines! Kathleen--I'm glad you enjoyed. Michael--I'm so glad that you liked this poem. Marge--You better not! Hugs! Mysteria--What a lovely response...thank you! Janet--you are the cool one, my friend...way cool! Kit--thanks so much for stopping by to read. JLR--You were there too? Fun wasn't it! |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Martie, This is close enough to the assignment I gave you, so forget that one and spend the rest of the day just goofing off. This really is good. I hope you realize that. :-) Michael Proust- |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
This one almost slipped away - without my seeing it - and that would have been a real tragedy - A Treauurs FOR SURE !!!!! |
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Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Wonderful imagery...very good poem! Nathan |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
I love this. It brought back memories. My husband just never grew up. I did not dare go outside if he had a hose in his hands. Thanks Joyce |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
I love the hot and coolness of it all. Nice write. All writing comes |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Yanno, every now and then a poem comes along to knock all pomposity right out of me and remind me that I miss plenty... which is sort of a redundant reminder for a blonde. LOL. I don't know how I'd missed this one... but it's a delight... it makes me think of my little nephew playing with the water hose... watering the plants, drinking from the hose... and chasing an aunt who'd rather remain dry! LOL ... there's nothing like a child's giggle! |
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