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Cascading Hurts
| Open Poetry #13 |
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Cascading Hurts |
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Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea 
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Cascading Hurts by Michael Auguste In crystal hoarfrost evening, beneath soft starlight's glow, a man in doleful reverie tries stir himself from woe. A mournful spirit holds him close and will not let him be. Ten thousand fiery suns look down from coal-soot canopy. As trembling shadows move about, he tries so hard to heal. Cascading hurts fall one by one. If but, hearts could not feel. Now evermore in solitude he'll cloak his inner light. In loneliness he'll birth the words for poems that he will write. Proust- |
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| © Copyright 2001 Michael Auguste - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Michael, let the light shine.... |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
This was so beautifully written Michael, I enjoyed reading this very much. You weave magic with your words. Regards......Sue Suetang |
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Just A Woman Senior Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 507 |
You write with such a distinct personal touch. You never fail to tug the emotions. I so admire your writing.  "Often the test of courage is not to die but to live" |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I loved your use of words in this, Michael..."hoarfrost evening", "fiery suns", and "coal-soot canopy"...very original and descriptive. The ending is sad...I would like to see your light un-cloaked. |
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Mabel A. Dilley Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 859Seattle, WA, USA |
Masterfully written. I do believe you could write and allow your reader any belief possible. Muses do that you know. "I am not now that which I have been." |
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elizabeth anne Member
since 2001-03-29
Posts 83 |
Sad and provocative... Elizabeth Anne |
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Greeneyes 
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
beautiful, Michael....so touching your words always... be wellGreeneyes~ *** "Within you I lose myself |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Sunshine, I just can't. Thanks for reading this. Sue, Your words are most generous and I do so appreciate your nice comments. Thank you. Just A Woman, That you admire my writing, greatly pleases me. Thank you, sincerely. Martie, It is no longer possible to uncloak my light. I'm sorry. I will only do so in my poetry from now on. Thanks for the nice comments. Julian, Thank you for the "masterfully written." What a wonderful compliment that is. Elizabeth Anne, Thanks for stopping by and reading this. Welcome to Passions. I think you'll really like it here. Greeneyes, Thank you for liking this one. I'm always happy to see your post on one of my poems. Michael Proust- |
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Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
Such a haunting piece, wrought by heart... |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
very sad, I would delete some of the modifiers used in this and make the nouns and verbs do the work, that's my critique, be more specific... i.e. "emptiness, woe, mourning, shadows" are too vague......best to you! |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Decaflame, Thanks for reading and responding to this one. Yes, haunting would be a good description. Michael Proust- |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Irish Rose, Under ordinary circumstances you would be correct. However, I purposely chose to be vague in this piece because it deals with a personal matter that I want kept private. I hope you understand and I appreciate you taking the time to read. Michael Proust- |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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