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Open Poetry #13
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How Chlidren Sleep
| Open Poetry #13 |
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How Chlidren Sleep |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla 
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Rewrite: How children Sleep Each child sleeps a cradles reap. From sun to moon from wake to sleep. The sun comes up the moon goes down. Each child dresses a daily gown. The sun pans new with sheaves of light And phantom shadows leave with night The children won a kingdoms pour. Until the sun has done its awe. The world is full of striking slings. Of living dreams and touching things. And children play within this dell The sun and moon just ring the bell. All children see the last of light. All shadows fall to endless night. The sun has fled. The moon is dead. Each child will sleep a final bed. And though this story lacks vainglory It is to me a hoary story. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
To thee it may be but a hoary story but in it I find a semblance of glory |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This time I like your opener best, Sy...  "Each child sleeps a cradles reap. From sun to moon from wake to sleep." ((HUGS)) - Just cuz you missed it...  |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine, Thank you sweet. *L* Nan, Since I remember the real one this one was almost as good and I send both hugs and love back. PS. The frist two lines were the best. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sy: I loved the sound of this...even read it outloud to my cat...who wasn't that impressed...but she knows nothing except herself. My favorite stanza: "The world is full of striking slings. Of living dreams and touching things. And children play within this dell The sun and moon just ring the bell" Thanks for your youness! |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Superb! The flow is delightful...it has a nonsensical feel, yet its depth is much profound. I really like this, it should be in print in many homes with fantastic illustrations. I truly enjoyed the read, in fact I'm going back to read again! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The sun comes up the moon goes down. Each child dresses a daily gown. The sun pans new with sheaves of light And phantom shadows leave with night The children won a kingdoms pour. Until the sun has done its awe. The world is full of striking slings. Of living dreams and touching things. And children play within this dell The sun and moon just ring the bell. All children see the last of light. All shadows fall to endless night. The sun has fled. The moon is dead. Each child will sleep a final bed.. ======================= do you know how cool this poem is... oh man I love the way your mind works you just cleverly penned the cycles of a day and of a life ... and wrapped it up in a nursery rhyme and lullaby .. and then you modestly say it has no glory.. and Hoary??? ... just another word for aquired WISDOM. like I said....you put the C in COOL. this is yet another Sy-treasure for my collection.  *ww* me   I love your imperfections ... I love your everything ... |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie, Thank you for being you, you are one of my favorites. *L* Vas, Wonderful descriptive comment. Thank you. |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
The sun and moon just ring the bell? The cycle of our lives? I'll have to think about this one. Joyce |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JM, We must have crossed. You know if I ever publish I would want you to write the prologue. You just brandy my Randy. Winkiewinkie Stinky |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Joyce, Just a symbolic lullaby. Not a pry but a sigh Thank you for the read and interesting comment. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Seymour~ You are a wonderful storyteller. This is so lovely - 'Each child sleeps a cradles reap. From sun to moon from wake to sleep. The sun comes up the moon goes down. Each child dresses a daily gown.' Love n' hugs~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Marge, Thanks for the lovely, love n' hugs. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I enjoyed this one very much, Seymour... a whimsical delight. *S* |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Suthern, Thank you again. *L* |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I MISS RANDY I MISS STINKY I MISS SY I MISS MY WINKIE WINKIE HES ONLY BEEN GONE HIS TRIP THREE DAYS .. AND OH NO ... WE GOT WEEKS TO GO!! I MISS MY RHYME DIVINE I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW *winkiewinkie* me  |
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Watersign6 Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823Hurricane,WV |
i cant begin to tell you how much i love this one its truely a treasure  |
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