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Fate Rests Upon My Shoulder
| Open Poetry #13 |
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Fate Rests Upon My Shoulder |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada 
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Fate Rests Upon My Shoulder That little voice inside that guides, then quickly disappears, I'm told is your subconscious speaking, if you choose to hear; I've thanked that little friend of mine who helped me time again, The one who sits upon my shoulder whispering, but then … One day I noticed things had changed, no longer was there "one", It seems that tiny voice was joined by one who wanted fun; That sweet and trusting voice I knew that guided me each day, Was drowned out by another who just would not go away. Replaced by her sweet guidance, came this low sarcastic drone, It prodded and cajoled my thoughts of all it would condone; His booming voice came from the left, while she spoke from the right, My mind would bounce from right to wrong, all day and through the night. I placed my hands upon my head, I wasn't too amused, I couldn't tell my left from right … was getting quite confused! Distraught, I passed my vanity, looked up and gave a pause, In hopes that I could stare into the depths of me … the cause. I clutched the counter, gazed in awe, at what confronted me, Two little people on my shoulders arguing with glee! Upon my right, in flowing gown, an angel had appeared, While on my left, a little devil whispered in my ear. I saw the lovely angle's face turn ashen at his words, She blushed and stomped her tiny feet at comments she had heard; He giggled and he laughed and twirled in ultimate delight, While she dug in her heals and fought … it really was a sight! Debate ran hot and heavy, fingers pointing, voices raised, While back and forth and back and forth, they argued in a daze; They stayed absorbed in all this talk, engrossed in their dispute, Till all at once, they noticed me, and both went quickly mute. She smiled at me, this angel, whom I knew so very well, While on my left, the devil grabbed my ear and gave a yell! He startled me … I glared at him, and shouted "Go away!" "My life was fine until you came along the other day!" He laughed and grinned, then winked at me, was bold beyond belief, He said he would not leave, and that I could not find relief; I looked toward my angel, quite exasperated now, She sat down, crossed her legs, and wiped the sweat from off her brow. She threw her hands up in the air, and sighed, "It's up to you." "I've told you all I can my dear, now tell me what you'll do." The little devil gave a roar, assuming her defeat, He skipped about my shoulder in a state of pure conceit. I watched him do his little dance, I saw her start to cry, My eyes went back and forth between the two, I had to try … I pondered on the arguments, the points that each had shown, And in the end, I made my choice, 'twas mine, and mine alone. I stared at my sweet angel, raised my hand in threatening pose, Then flicked that little devil off my shoulder … case was closed! /Kit McCallum [This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 04-13-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Kit McCallum - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
You do write a lovely ballad, Kit. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
OK... now tell the truth Kit-gator.... did the lil devil look like this?  or like this?  or like this?  or like this?  ROFL ... come on you can tell us... was it Deer, or LJ or TOE????? very cute and clever cadence kissed gem from you sweet poetess... and we all knew you'd make the right choice... our Kit is a good-girlie girl  and its so good to see your name here.. We miss you and your poetry, as well as your friendly spirit  me |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
A fun read ... and packs a punch too ! |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kit~ This is so wonderful ! And so YOU ! I just loved it ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Kit, this is a marvelous work - your work has evolved into something even more wonderful! Corinne |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Wonderful write, Kit. I love the part at the end with the devil. LOL. All writing comes |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Not only fate, my dear, resting on your shoulder, but common sense, and ultimate right.... you flicked that devil into the night! |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
excellent writing!!! every word, every phrase, the storyline, the meter... all of it superior work! bravo!! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Yes, BRAVO, Kit!! Excellent writing!! It's always a pleasure to read one of your perfect gems!! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Wonderful Kit!!! And I sort of rooting for the Angel to win...(though it would be fun to see you being Devilish!) |
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KokoStewartKoomoa Senior Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 580Waikiki, Hawaii |
Wonderful ! I admire your poetic grace and do enjoy the weaving of the tale with our expertise. Smiles...aloha, Aloha with warmest regards, Koko |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Nice goin', Kit, enjoyed reading this. (but how come the devil is always a Guy ???) Kraw' /:-}== |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Enjoyed this little story Perfect rhyme and meter, of course Well done Liz |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
~Kathleen: Thank you Kathleen, that means a great deal to me! ~Janet Marie: ROFL ... I'll never tell what he looked like, LOL! I've missed everyone too. I hope to get some good reading and responding in this holiday weekend, Love ya JM! ~Rex: LOL, and punched he was, thanks for enjoying Rex! ~Marge: *Smiling* ... so "me"? I love that, thank you Marge! ~Corinne: What a lovely response Corinne, thank you so very much! ~Lone Wolf: LOL, that was fun for me too Lone Wolf, thank you, glad you enjoyed! ~Karilea: Thanks Karilea, lets just hope he doesn't return, LOL! ~Doreen: Thank you soooo much for these kind thoughts and the "bravo" Doreen, much appreciated! ~Denise: And it's always a pleasure to know that you've enjoyed, thanks Denise! ~Sharon: LOL, well the Angel won this round Sharon, but that little devil has a way of turning my head once in a while ... he'll be back! ~Koko: Aloha! Thank you for this lovely response Koko, I'm so glad you enjoyed the tale! ~Krawdad: ROFL, I wondered who was going to ask me that one! Now, I did recently watch "Bedazzled" where Elizabeth Hurley is a female devil, so it's not always the case, LOL! Thanks Kraw! ~Liz: *Smiling* Thank you Liz, it's wonderful to hear from you, and I'm so glad you enjoyed this little weave, many hugs my friend! Much appreciation to all, /Kit |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I love this, Kit! *S* You've woven a delightful tale with poetic perfection... and left me smiling. *S* |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Kit--This is wonderful!! Thanks so much for the smile. |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
~Suthern: And you left me smiling too Suthern, thank you sooooo much! ~Martie: My turn to thank you too Martie, smiling right back with you, many thanks! Much appreciation to you both, /Kit |
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