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Open Poetry #13
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If Only!
| Open Poetry #13 |
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If Only! |
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dreamy_eyes Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 67 |
Everything I have done I regret, I put it all behind me try and forget, I think I could have found a way, If only I didn't see him everyday. Everything I see is so sad, or full of violence, red and mad, I would change this if I could, If only my life was full of good. Everyone I touch I push away, usually because of the things I say, it's so hard to trust and love again, If only someone would get rid of men. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Debi - All Rights Reserved | |||
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dreamy_eyes Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 67 |
I'm writing poems again! I've been getting my life back on track I'm not quite there yet but things are going alright! Anyway tell me what you think of my poem please! Luv Deb xXx  |
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Panne447 Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 196S.A. TX |
Debbie, I like this - a lot. And can totally empathize with the last line - many times in my life. And then again, if you change the gender in that line I can still feel the pain as I have been there too. Some days it is just that way. Keep writing and praying - both help with tracks and getting where we want to be. Panne |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
i thought it was cool debbie and i am glad you are writing again o yuh! |
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Mabel A. Dilley Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 859Seattle, WA, USA |
I am always delighted when poets continue to write through the ups and downs of life. The poem itself is well written. I, however, would change the voice of the poem. For me it is too self-deprecating. I am looking for your next poem wherein you stand in sunlight and bask in self confidence. ~Julian "I am not now that which I have been." |
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Mother_Earth Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 13701/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan |
Debbie, you are being a bit hard on yourself, but you seem to know why. I am sure things will get better as you get stronger. Good luck, my girl and hugs, ME |
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