The padded walls of the mind...

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Voiceless
Senior Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 686
Under the stars upon the wind

0 posted 2001-05-07 08:50 PM

I sit to ponder just to think
"Why is it me?"
On numerous occasions this though
had but arrived
but the answer which never came
left me always searching with a
feeling of imprisoned confusion.
For how can a room
that's is so white
leave one feeling
Claustaphobic
like when seeing a cliff
on a movie can make one
afraid of hieghts when
there is truely no hieght at all..
I have spent many a day locked away
with just my thoughts in my head
But yet all the time thinking has left me with nothing but confusion
A plain and simple tick followed with an echoing tock
continueously laugh at my pain
oh how they mock
But if you were left how would you fair,
how would it feel to have no one to care?
So unjust is this treatment
that I find myself growing with a hate undetained.
I would rather die then to hear that chuckling tock
But that was the problem with which this begun
when before the tick had its say and the tock did talk.
When from the mist of my past came a memory
that I wished wouldn't last.
Now how would you feel
when you have something to hide and a foolish whisper
won't put it aside!
When it keeps demanding to be heard,
but yet truelly hasn't spoken a word.
When you try to sleep
the dreams just won't come,
for the whisper turns to screams
so instead the dreams run.
When all that has kept a pure hear
does but be threatened to be torn apart.
Then many a night did I spend
yelling at the whisper, the voice of a dear friend.
Friend as it may be
it had now become a sour enemy!
Drifting days of hoarse cries with nothing but a cruel,
"What do you think?" as a reply.
How could I please this voice that wouldn't stop,
"Just tell me what to say and you'll recieve the
answer you want!"
But when this was uttered came the mock,
"What do you think I want to hear?"
So I knew then and there,
and made my point clear.
"I want to hear you shut up and disappear!"
with the patientence of a lonely slug
came a "Why is that?"
To the edge I had been thrown,
the fury on my face had to have shown
then with a voice that contained a smile
came the "I guess that is enough for awhile"
So that night when the voice strained in my head,
I stepped on the cold gravel with
barefooted feet.
For once the voice was what I seeked.
Then with the caution of an hunted fox,
I reached in my pocket for a small box.
Then with a quick flash of light
I threw the match and watched the sight.
I laughed as the voice screamed and burned.
I laughed as by the arms I was pulled.
I laughed the laugh of someone who has for the first time
disposed of bitterness.
I laughed as I was driven away.
I chuckle now as I remember the day.
Tick and Tock they laugh too.
For I had beat the voice who played my misery as a game.
But tick and tock just won't stop,
don't they understand they can't laugh forever.
But what if it's me that they continueously sneer.
Is it the truth that I am what they do mock.
"Why is it me?"
But then why in a room so white
am I claustaphobic.
It is like a cliff on a movie..

~*Freedom Is Not Free*~ (Korean War Memorial)

Rosebud1229
Senior Member

since 2000-04-05

Posts 1813
North Carolina

1 posted 2001-05-07 11:48 PM

the mind loves the get the better of us, doesn't it? Confusion also loves the ride along to, don't worry my friend, I've been there too. great write

a-alibaster
Member

since 2000-01-08

Posts 392

2 posted 2001-05-08 12:53 PM

This is wonderful...if I could only tell you how much of this I feel and completely understand...
Until...ali

"There is an alter ego which
dwells in every soul..."
a-alibaster

"I am as I am, nothing more, nothing less,
I am tears of pain, tears of Death.

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