Winter Walk - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Dark Poetry #3

Winter Walk

Annie
Junior Member

since 2003-07-23

Posts 42
Seattle, WA

0 posted 2003-07-28 01:06 AM

My foot
Steps on thin ice
Puddles, the sound is like
Breath escaping collapsed lungs: a
Slow death.

AniKay83
Member

since 2000-06-28

Posts 388
Missing Since 1999

1 posted 2003-07-28 02:19 AM

You pack a lot in a few lines. Nice.

onward to the end of passing!
~*PaVeMeNt PrOwL*~
with small wills snapped by the bright city
~*SoUl ShUfFlE*~

mysticpoe
Senior Member

since 2003-02-28

Posts 883

2 posted 2003-07-28 10:09 AM

Well Annie, you went deep w/this one. very good.

mysticpoe

If nothing is something
then everything is
our thoughts and feelings
and all that exists.

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

3 posted 2003-07-28 01:45 PM

Very good imagery...nice and dark.
~wranx

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

4 posted 2003-07-28 04:34 PM

good, very good. I loved the end. Your know your talented..when you can such an impact in only 5 lines.

Keep it up..
~LEX

[This message has been edited by Lexy (07-28-2003 04:35 PM).]

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.