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wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

0 posted 2002-08-14 10:29 PM

Do you recall
The very first time
That your father
Requested
That you kill a man?

Not a request, actually
A demand, in reality

And not just a man
In any general sense
But one particular
Human being

An unsavory task
Framed as familial
Obligation

I remember that moment
As being quite
Disconcerting

We had always lived
On the edge of Mans’ Law
A tax tweak
A code cheat
Some minor smuggling

But, not this

This was a concept
Quite alien to me

Was he not
The very person
That instilled in me
The ability to judge
The value of an action

To differentiate between
The Right thing
And the Other?

So, there I sat
Dumbfounded
As he calmly traced
Upon his map of rage
The route
That I should take
To my damnation

And a part of me
To this very day
Wants to say

Sorry Dad,
That I was unable
To give you back
My humanity

~wranx

The shortest distance between two points...
is sometimes, intolerable.

Bukowski

[This message has been edited by wranx (08-15-2002 02:56 AM).]

Purity
Senior Member

since 2001-11-20

Posts 526
Once Upon, USA

1 posted 2002-08-15 12:18 PM

Humanity as gift exhanged for misguided cardboard box of confusion in plethora...
Intensity personified. (Once again) Dude, I dug it, in a "hope my arm can hold its length" kinda way. Good one!

[This message has been edited by Purity (08-15-2002 12:18 AM).]

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

2 posted 2002-08-15 12:58 PM

Thanks, Purity friend
This thing has been eating me off & on.
Decided to take a bite back.

~wranx

brian sites
Senior Member

since 2002-06-25

Posts 1475
usa

3 posted 2002-08-15 01:15 AM

the force leaves me a little speechless
but,
I think this may be a favorite of mine
Cuts down to the bone
and the last lines
twist the blade
stunnedBS

I never aimed at reality; I aimed at truth. --Orson Welles

News_From_Nowhere
Member

since 2002-06-14

Posts 173
CU, NY

4 posted 2002-08-15 02:27 AM

So vivid and harsh
That it wreaks of incredibleness
Will take a while
To stomach
Which makes it great

"So give life to your dreams, for there lies your survival, and cast your heart beyond those faded scenes, and I'll bring you through the storm

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

5 posted 2002-08-15 03:03 AM

brian, N_F_N,

This was an uncomfortable...uh, subject for me.
Been trying to write this for awhile, and in second guess, would probably wish not to have done it.
Oh well, a peek inside.

Sheesh.

~wranx

The shortest distance between two points...
is sometimes, intolerable.

Bukowski

WhiteRose
Member Elite

since 2002-07-23

Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon

6 posted 2002-08-15 03:29 PM

This was pretty incredible wranx. A struggle with a man that you loved and of course from whom your very morals come. A great write, one of your best.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

7 posted 2002-08-15 06:00 PM

hey. Don't regret the write.

Some times? I write just to get things OUTTA me...and yep? A few times I felt like Mia Farrow in "Rosemary's Baby" too!

*chuckle*

But funny, the catholics rites of exorcism have much in common with modern day psychology, in that the first step, is to know the name of the demon--

I say, "Run naked through the forum!"

Those that don't understand? May never understand. Hugs you.

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

8 posted 2002-08-16 12:38 PM

Thanks much, WhiteRose, methinks you understand.

Karenity, It's true that those who will not, can not. I have known this forever.

Out, out, damned spot!

~wranx

In reply to "which way do we go?", the answer was never "straight", but, "progressively forward".

Bukowski

WhileIWasGone
Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 486

9 posted 2002-08-16 04:30 PM

Very nice wranx...you have a great way with words. Smooches and lots of hugs....

Amore,
DeaDiAmore

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

10 posted 2002-08-19 12:22 PM

Not only do I respect this poem and what it means, I love its strength and confusion and just plain .... man, I'm sorta speechless. What i mean to say is, you take something so writ large, and compress it to the size of one man and his map of rage.

Wow, you're good!

Mikey

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