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Dark Poetry #3
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| Dark Poetry #3 |
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By far |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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The sun, she swelled up to my size before she fell to pieces. The glass tipped over off the table, spilling petal drops. Time took hold of moment's hand, two bird wings in the mirror. The silver was not light enough to hold the moon, rain stars. (A song to wish the verse she wrote was enough by far) |
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LadyPeach1 Member
since 2001-06-04
Posts 282 |
The silver was not light enough to hold the moon, rain stars. This line is very interesting and it has a beauty to it that is mysterious. This poem was very nicely written. good job LP1 |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Interesting collection of images here b.. They almost seem random. If you wouldn't mind, could you enlighten me as to what you had in mind while writing it?  K |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
What I had in mind is what's already on the page, but: - The sun falls to pieces. (in the narrator's mind?) A glass falls to pieces, spilling wine (and/or flowers). Seeing the effects of time in the mirror. Seeing nature in the mirror, unsullied. Wishing her image were there as the moon's is. ** Glad you enjoyed. [This message has been edited by bsquirrel (05-06-2002 03:30 PM).] |
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