Teen Poetry #4 |
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insanity |
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grey::tears Junior Member
since 2001-03-07
Posts 19lost within my mind |
insanity rock back and forth in the chair talk to someone, whos not there come someone, wont you play i swear i just heard someone say... im all alone and cold at night i bundle myself, in my own fright please, i beg for sleep counting and killing the little sheep death, please take me from this place so lost, i never even saw the race take these voices from my head lay me safe and sound in bed i go to sleep and cry my eyes out now, there is no more use to pout im sorry mam, but shes gone she knew in life, she was only a pawn this girl, told you a lie was it worth her to die? she meant to tell she really did but she was afraid, and instead she hid but dont worry, it didnt take her far for every lie, left a scar AKS [This message has been edited by grey::tears (edited 03-09-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Alex Stoyko - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Welcome to Passions!! Well done on this one!! The style you used is quite nice and the formatting of it all put a punch in it. The message of it was well thought out. I liked the final thought too, how every lie left a scar which is just so true. I liked it pal and hope to see you post more often...... ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Allan Riverwood![]() ![]()
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
This was well done... the spacing was interesting, and I'm not sure if it was intended but it changed the flow of the poem. And the last line was marvelous. Welcome to Passions. Hope you enjoy your stay, and I hope that stay is a long one. ![]() ~Allan If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort |
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Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
![]() ![]() Awesome first post. I love this poem. Very emotion-filled. It's going straight to my library. Job very well done. I'm going to like you. *Jennifer "My nightmare isn't fearing what I dream... It's waking up, knowing what I'll see." |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
Oh this is wonderful! I've been having bouts with insanity. It's Colin's fault though!! and that play!!! UGHH!!! make it stop!!! "Packuta packuta packuta packuta packuta packuta packuta packuta..." "Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!! Nice to see a new face in the forum. We're glad you've decided to join us. You should fing everyone in here welcoming you with open arms. As to you first post. You've have shown me that you are very talented You have penned such strong feelings and thoughts keep sharing ps..pls check your email "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S. |
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Child of the Stars![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Hi!!!!!! WELCOME!!!!! Yer gonna luv it here. The poem kicked butt. Makes me proud to be slightly insane. ![]() ~Carly "The eye sees a thing more clearly in dreams than the imagination awake." - Leonardo da Vinci |
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Heart=Life Junior Member
since 2001-02-03
Posts 29United Kingdom |
Avn't seen a poem like this one in ages that is really good, Done a great job on the wording and gives us something to think about. Very good job, so i greet you "Welcome" |
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~sugarpie313~ Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375Maine, USA |
OMG! I LOVE THIS!! i'm glad we think along the same lines... hehehe jk but hey lovely first post, definitely goin in my library!! ~Valerie~ *Life can take your dreams and turn them upside down, Friends will talk about you when you're not around, but don't ever lose that light in your eyes* |
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DancinQueen![]()
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
![]() This was an awesome post..i especially love the counting and killing sheep ![]() *dq ¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤ |
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Wicced_Witch Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110Clarksville, TN, USA |
Welcome to Passions ![]() Great first post. I really loved it and will love to read more from you. Steph. |
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Neokrew Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 60VA |
Hey, Welcome to I am going to say netpoets cause I like it batter that name piptalk but you know what I mean. Great first poem as Tears of Glass said very emotional (Is that how you spell emotional?? I am a little slow you know :)) Well I hope to see more of your poems and cya later -- Linc |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Wow this is great, I'm impressed. Like everyone's said, very emotional and powerful. Good job! Welcome to Passions. ![]() ![]() Bel |
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