Teen Poetry #4 |
When Will I See You Again? |
Angelwings Member
since 1999-08-27
Posts 222IL, USA |
The first time I saw you I knew you were for me. That cute little grin, that sparkle in your eyes, that way you seemed so sweet. You looked at me with a smile that gleamed from ear to ear. That moment in time I knew that you would be mine. But our days together suddenly had to end when you said goodbye. My life doesn't seem complete without you by my side. Not a single day goes by that I don't ask myself why I didn't tell you how I felt My feelings for you keep growing and not a moment in time goes by that you aren't in my heart, my mind and in my soul. When will I see you again? When will you return to me? [This message has been edited by Angelwings (edited 03-08-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Chelsea Thompson - All Rights Reserved | |||
fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
Angelwings: I was really impressed with the first stanza of this. It seemed to flow quite well. The second stanza is a little choppy in parts. However, I think that on the whole your poem conveyed itself quite well. "If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh" -- Magus |
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luvnkris Member
since 2000-08-31
Posts 144Perth, Australia |
Hey Angelwings, this is a great poem i really enjoyed it & i thought it went together really nicely! Luv Jo xoxo * never live a second without being grateful for all you have around you* |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Oh... this is a sad piece. Well I really hope everything is improving. All I can say is that sometimes it is important for us to move on with our lives, not to dwell on sorrow for too long. Poetry is a good way to get this feeling out of your system. My theory is that, once the body has the feelings recorded on paper, it has an easier time forgetting them. Keep your head high, my friend. If you must speak to me, just send me an email or something. ~Allan Stupidity makes the world go around...and people like us laugh. ~~Elizabeth, to Allan |
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WaitN4AnAngel Junior Member
since 2001-03-08
Posts 37I wish I knew where I was... |
I really liked your poem. I'm sure it has a lot of meaning for you, b/c you really sound like this is something you have been through, and like it really hurt you. Keep posting *Me* *If you dont stand for something, youll fall for anything* *A smile is a curve that straightens out a lot of things* |
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Angelwings Member
since 1999-08-27
Posts 222IL, USA |
Thank you all for your comments. I have edited my poem hope it is to your liking. And yes this poem is about something I had been through. Glad it touched you. Thanks for your concern Allan. Have a wonderful weekend. And good luck in future writings. |
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Shygirl82 Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245Ilinois |
Great poem...I can tell this someone meant alot to you. I hope you can move on for I am sure there is someone just as wonderful or more wonderful waiting for you... love ya ~Nikki~ |
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Angelwings Member
since 1999-08-27
Posts 222IL, USA |
Shygrl thank you so much. I hope that I can move on as well. Good luck on your future writings! Love you, too. Chelsea |
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Ski*Chick Member
since 2001-01-13
Posts 141Fitchburg, Mass, Usa |
Angelwings that was really good. I loved it, maybe someday you'll find him again. But until then keep your heart open. Minna |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Yea I know how this feels. I could relate to the poem pretty well. Sometimes we go through pain because it's a blessing in disguise. anyway, wonderful job! I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
really sad post I believe in what Allan said maybe we just have to learn to move on it's hard, but you can do it thanks for the wonderful read keep writing i know it helps "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S. |
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Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
This is such a beautiful post! I LOVED it! It's very sad though... I hope things get better for you. This one's going into my library. Wonderfully done! *Jennifer "My nightmare isn't fearing what I dream... It's waking up, knowing what I'll see." |
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DancinQueen
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
great poem~ sad..and i read all these poems that people write about heartbreak, and it makes me never want to fall in love...especially so young because my chances of marrying that person are like slim to none...so i dont want to go through the heartbreak. *sigh* But good post!! LOL i was rambling for a bit...i tend to do that sometimes. but keep up the great work! *dq ¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤ |
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Angelwings Member
since 1999-08-27
Posts 222IL, USA |
Thank you all for reading my work. And yes Allan was right. It's best to move on. But what do you do when the heart won't go? Oh well. Only time will tell for me and my lost love. As for you Dancin' Queen. It's okay I truly believe in this old saying "It is better to have loved and lost to have never loved at all!" So true. And you never know you may marry the man or woman you are with right now. I am eighteen years old and some of the people I know married their high school sweethearts. Who knows? If it's meant to be it will be Thank you for reading my work and good luck to you all in future writings. "It's okay to ramble, that's when the best words come out" |
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