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Teen Poetry #4
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Death of my Dearest Friend
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Death of my Dearest Friend |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA 
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This has NOT happened, and I don't know why I wrote about it. But I showed it to her, and she started to cry. I asked her what was wrong, asie from it being really morbid, and she just said that nobody had ever told her she meant that much to them. I think it's long overdue. Do all your friends know how much they mean to you? Rain Salty rain from my clouded eyes Cold, bitter tears from the haze of my mind These drops are painful They sear my skin with a violent hiss Their fog adds to the haze I’m swimming, drowning In your wonderful crystal blue eyes Let me die in those eyes that blink no longer My salvation your touch once warm and soft, now fading My love causes these tears, yet fear makes them sting This rain means more Than my joy when you swore To return my promise of eternal love The rain means That I will never love again That you and I were and are two fitting pieces of a puzzle I could cry forever My tears could fill oceans My emotions could encompass the universe I feel like I can’t live But I don’t want to die I love you, I will love you forever The haze is fading I can think once more And I think to kiss you once more Before we are separated forever "Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK |
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| © Copyright 2001 Bryan W. Holmes - All Rights Reserved | |||
Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
...Wow...This was incredibly sad. I can see why it would scare you...Amazing piece you've got here. Keep writing... ~Carly "Nature is not only all that is visible to the eye--it also includes the inner pictures of the soul." ~Edvard Munch |
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HiddenSparklez Member
since 2000-12-29
Posts 190British Columbia, Canada |
Very well written poem, loved the imagery. This one is packed full of emotion. Keep it up!  "You do what you do, you say what you say, you try to be everything to everyone... come on now, do that stupid dance for me" -Everclear |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
Wow. Wow, wow, wow. That made ME almost cry. Send it to Tommy... Oh yeah. Did I mention that was AWESOME!?!?!?!?!?! Rhonda "I am Canadian" - Joe "When I find the right guy for me, I'll love him no matter what he does or what he's like" |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
*sob sob* What? I'm ~not~ crying! It's glandular! Hmm... that made no sense... *sniffle* Seriously, this poem RAWKED my friend! The best that I have seen of yours. Yes, I have written poems and eulogies for my friends, even though they haven't died yet. Call it a morbid passtime. I honestly did almost cry reading this. Your style is excellent, the metaphors, the wordplay... all top notch. And to the library it goes. -Allan The unintelligent are merely tools for the intelligent. That would make my house a veritable toolshed. ~~Allan Riverwood |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Wow nicely done here. I liked how you wrote this completely. WONDERFUL JOB!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
This is such a sad poem, it brought tears to my eyes! I'm so glad that you haven't lost this person, and that she now knows how you really feel about her. Beautiful thoughts and an important message, my friend. Thanks for sharing.  "Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli |
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~sugarpie313~ Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375Maine, USA |
Bryan this is awesome!! i knew you could write some good stuff!!! great job, i want to see everything you've written. ~*VALERIE*~ *Life can take your dreams and turn them upside down, Friends will talk about you when you're not around, but don't ever lose that light in your eyes* |
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Starr Member
since 2001-02-08
Posts 100 |
This was great, with feeling an' everything. I absolutely love it! Keep writing. Well done! |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Now I see the reason why she cried. well done So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S. |
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Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
This is very sad... but very well done. *Jennifer "My nightmare isn't fearing what I dream... It's waking up, knowing what I'll see." |
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Ski*Chick Member
since 2001-01-13
Posts 141Fitchburg, Mass, Usa |
That was so good, but sad at the same time.  You can hide, You can be crul, You can't be my friend. |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
well ive been going back through the pages that ive missed. and I found a poem, a poem that was utterly beautiful but so sad. It will go into my libary and never leave it... be proud. Regina |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
The more I read your work, the more speechless I become... it's all so deep and... WOW... |
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Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
I cant believe I didnt reply to this sooner... This poem is so magnificent as well as sad although it shows greatly the love you have for your friend and this person must be eternally greatful as am I that you shared this with us. Great job, my friend. The law of harvest is to reap more than you sow.Sow a habit and you reap a character.Sow a character and you reap a destiny |
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