Clumsy Kiss - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

WHiTePoNY
Junior Member

since 2001-06-17

Posts 13
South London. UK

0 posted 2001-06-17 05:11 PM

I SNEEK UP ON THE MISTRESS
WAITING FOR THE KISS
I KNOW I REALLY SUCK AT THIS
BUT WHEN WE DID IT WAS TRUE BLISS
ALL MY DOUBTS WERE DISMISSED

WE HAVE A LOVE LIKE NO OTHER
UNLIKE THAT FOR MY SEXY BROTHER?
I WILL TAKE HER TO BE MY LOVER
FOREVER AND EVER I WILL ADORE HER

"Push back the square
Now that you need her but you don't
So there you go!
Cause back in school
We are the leaders of it all" - DEFTONES

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2001-06-17 09:13 PM

I like this one. Very out there kind of style. Welcome to passions and I enjoyed your poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

2 posted 2001-06-17 10:17 PM

Very unique. Cute one here!!

Jenn

"If my heart had wings, I would fly to you and lie.. beside you as you dream, if my heart had wings." Faith Hill

fearing-laughter
Senior Member

since 2001-04-24

Posts 605
land of cheese (Wisconsin)

3 posted 2001-06-18 04:40 AM

hmmm...interesting (in a good way) this poem was pretty kool :-) welcome to passions, hope to read lots and lots more from ya. laterz
-fear-

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

4 posted 2001-06-18 09:26 AM

Good work it is very different but I liked it a lot.
Zu

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

5 posted 2001-06-18 11:20 AM

this was awesome.....its very not the norm....its great to read poems like that

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

6 posted 2001-06-18 02:41 PM

i liked that it was your own sylte...great job!...i enjoyed this a lot

...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

7 posted 2001-06-19 01:39 AM

This was a pretty good poem. Just a suggestion... next time, try not to use all caps in your poem. It makes the reader feel like they're being yelled at, and it's hard to read. I enjoyed the poem. Nice work.

--Marie

"Imagine a pageant...
In my head the flesh seems thicker,
Sandpaper tears corrode the filth,
And I need you now somehow." --Silverchair

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.