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jeremydraul
Senior Member

since 2000-08-01

Posts 1118
State of Despair

0 posted 2001-01-11 10:21 PM

Just looking around myself... admiring my messiness

"Array of Obscenities"

I unclose my door,
And pace on in.
Into my own nature,
Of tidy’s sin.

Clothes all over,
And images too.
Aluminum cans,
Aloft my shoe.

What a mess,
My dungeon endures.
It’s full of me,
There is no cure.

Clarify it not,
In it I take pride.
It’s a part of me,
Deep inside.

J.D. Raulinaitis 1/11/00

"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-01-11 10:26 PM

Beautiful. I feel the same way about my room!
I wonder what colour my carpet is? ~_^

Eternal life without the darkness isn't life at all- it is a lobotomy.

Bright_Eyes
Junior Member

since 2000-12-22

Posts 29
Plymouth, MN

2 posted 2001-01-11 10:41 PM

Ahh, aren't we all proud of our messy rooms! I love mine! I love how you can write about anything and everything you see! There is a poem in everything, just waiting to come out, and you can see those poems....what a gift! Favorite line: "I unclose my door"
Keep up the fantastic work!
~BECKY

Melster
Member

since 2000-12-09

Posts 442
Brisbane, Qld, Australia

3 posted 2001-01-12 05:32 AM

Ok guys... now I MUST clarify something here... it is not a mess, it is just we have to put things on the floor and everywhere because if we put them away, how are we supposed to find it again?? My room is a pigsty... I have peices of paper everywhere that have poems on them... honestly one day I will get myself organised... maybe... but I like my mess!!

Great Job on the poem, you have a great talent here Jeremy...

Melz!!

You can't hurt me anymore than I have hurt myself already...

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-01-12 01:09 PM

*burps*

Hey nice one here jer!! I liked the title a lot. Pretty good poem too!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Lakewalker
Member Elite

since 2000-08-05

Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people

5 posted 2001-01-12 02:35 PM

I tried to clean/rearrange my bedroom and it ended up being an even bigger mess. I thought that was pretty funny

Great job on the poem! This one could be looked at deeper than that though, maybe that's just me.

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

jeremydraul
Senior Member

since 2000-08-01

Posts 1118
State of Despair

6 posted 2001-01-12 11:35 PM

thanks bunches guys... my mom told me to clean my room.... maybe when I get a girlfriend?

~JDR

"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

7 posted 2001-01-20 11:59 PM

I have one really good advice to all of you when it comes to keeping your rooms clean.
If you all don't want to have clothes and stuff lying all over the floor anymore, just do what I do
Find one good spot, like on top of the dresser, and throw everything on top of it
That should keep your floors clean

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR

The Lost Supertone
Member

since 2001-01-20

Posts 74
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada

8 posted 2001-01-21 12:18 PM

Man tha'ts why I use a computer, although my room is still a mess, it's just clothes... yeah and my roller blades and boxes and skoo junk... yeah well oh maybe I should re organise my computer... well at least what really matters to me is safe... My CDs are all encoded to MP3s, my Graphics are all digital on my iMac, and my Poems are on my iMac too... and my friends are all online... sept most of them I have never seen face to face. But they are still in a lot of cases better friends than my non virtual ones.

anomaly187
Member

since 2000-06-15

Posts 284
San Francisco,CA,US

9 posted 2001-01-21 12:26 PM

STORY OF MY LIFE!!!..lol great poem

"It's better to burn out then fade away"

IsGona
Senior Member

since 2000-07-14

Posts 723

10 posted 2001-01-21 02:41 AM

LOL I hear ya. I never clean unless my gf's coming over. HAHA. Nice poem. I love your poems man... REALLY. I like how you can write serious and non-serious poems with the same grace. again, great job.
~Jason

"Every body has their destiny...
I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN
~Hatebreed~

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