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Teen Poetry #4
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Million Dollar Mile
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Million Dollar Mile |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia 
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I'm tired of spending every day Hidden behind you, Watching your every move, And wondering what it takes to survive. It's like I'm standing here, Hiding in the harsh folds of my sweater, Not because I can't win, But because I don't even want to try. Every piece of dirtied luggage That you toss on me, Adds another step to my ladder; And it seems I can only apologize When really, It isn't even my fault. --Marie subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart. [This message has been edited by Fading Away (edited 05-01-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Jennifer Floyd - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Wow Marie....this one was pretty jam packed with power......I hope allz well.. ~Carly "Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the self-same well from which your laughter rises was often-times filled with your tears." ~Kahil Gibran |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
This is a very powerful piece. Being stepped on is really tough, but you shouldn't apologize to this person. I hope things work out for you. Thanks for sharing.  "Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
I can only echo everyone else and say that this is a really powerful poem. you packed as much emotion into ths as you could have and i wouldn't change a thing about it. this gave me shivers, great writing love. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed reading your poem...James |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
your poems always gives.. me something to think about... powerful...and hard situation in life so much unfairness but you explained it so well i liked this poem..and enjoyed by me thanks for sharing marie  ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
sounds like a broken record..but this is powerful...great job!! *KiM* |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Then don't apologize! I enjoyed the poem, but don't feel bad if you didn't do anything....that's a sign of a low self esteem. But anyway, well done!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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chas Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101Lynn, ma |
Humm……..chocolate |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I didn't like this, but I really don't like free verse all that much so I'm biased.  It seemed to have a lot of emotion behind it. I'll echo Javier's advice. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Despite the way it is written, there is a lot of strength behind it. Well done, Marie. Another enjoyed read. ~AF~ "Always keep focus on your dreams because most often than not that's all you'll have." - Javier |
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paper doll Member
since 2002-08-04
Posts 133Floating on Uncertainty |
I don't usually feel poems as such but this one spoke straight to my heart. It's never enough for some people and we always end up as the scape goat. Wonderful piece of writing. Hopefully things will have improved for you. ~M Imagination=nostalgia for the past, the absent; it is the liquid solution in which art develops the snapshots of reality. |
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