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Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

0 posted 2001-03-30 02:02 PM

i feel half dead
but deep inside
there's a girl still kicking
she's so angry at me
that'd i'd give up on her
that i'd lose my will
when day to day
it takes everything
just to breathe
silent thunder
shakes my body
and i feel myself forgetting
why i ever cared at all
i can't stop the abandonment
of my every dream
my every strength and purity
i don't even believe in anything
anymore
and you're still screaming at me
she hears you
but i don't
i hate it when you
make her cry
it deepens the pool of darkness
already drowning my soul
someday it won't happen this way
but i'll still be me
or maybe not at all
the ghosts are always hard to see

[This message has been edited by Dark Enchantress (edited 03-30-2001).]

TearsOfPearls
Member

since 1999-09-23

Posts 322
Vereeniging, South-Africa

1 posted 2001-03-30 02:18 PM

Excellent poem! It is so angry, but at the same time it is so very sad.

I loved it!

LoveBug

Moderator

Member Elite

since 2000-01-08

Posts 4697

2 posted 2001-03-30 03:54 PM

I can really feel the sadness and frustration in this piece. We all have times like these, and you describe the darkness with such beauty. I hope things get better for you soon... if you write about sad situations so beautifully, just imagine how it will be when you write about a happy situation! Thanks for sharing.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

3 posted 2001-03-31 05:12 AM

I'll agree, this piece is rather dark, but radiates emotion. Very well done, as per usual. I'd like to be able to write free verse like you.

~Allan

Its rather handy being at the top of the food chain...you can sort things out and not get the blame for it. ~~Elizabeth Johnson (anonymousfemale)

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

4 posted 2001-03-31 11:54 AM

i like dark. i agree its angry, but sad. great read.

regina

a small cut is only the beggining of a life in pain

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

5 posted 2001-03-31 02:46 PM

This a very sad and dark poem. I liked it, though. It's very well written. Thanks for sharing... keep posting

--Marie

It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

6 posted 2001-04-01 08:51 PM

Dark......but hey you're the dark enchantress.......you....uh.....enchant darkness......

nicely done here!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Child of the Stars

Senior Member

since 2000-09-07

Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

7 posted 2001-04-01 08:53 PM

Wow.....this is a lot like some thoughts I've had...very good job...library....
~Carly

Many miles behind my eyelashes, there always seems to be
the strangest things, the slightly sane, that only I can see...

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

8 posted 2001-04-09 05:14 PM

that's kinda sad
i don't really know what to say right now
hope things get better for you

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

9 posted 2001-04-09 06:04 PM

when day to day
                         it takes everything
                         just to breathe
                         silent thunder
                         shakes my body
                         and i feel myself forgetting
                         why i ever cared at all
                         i can't stop the abandonment
                         of my every dream
                         my every strength and purity
                         i don't even believe in anything
                         anymore

Hey fellow Dark Angel
a very sad and angry poem you have penned m'dear

I've been there as well hon
Many HUGS  from me.
Great writing!

Maree

Love which is not always springing is always dying.

Kahlil Gibran

Dana Samples
Member

since 2001-04-07

Posts 68

10 posted 2001-04-09 06:38 PM

I LLOOOVVVEEE dark poetry!!!! it was great!! i know exactly what you feel. i've been there to many times. keep it up!!

lots of love, dana

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

11 posted 2001-04-09 08:09 PM

You express your emotions so well in your writing, i really love reading your work. i certainly hope things get better.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

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