Open Poetry #12 |
On Distant Shore |
Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
I walk along a distant shore, Seeking solace upon yon moor, Where long ago, bards penned their craft, As Damsal's swooned and peasants laughed From music of the poet's quill, As sweet as song of whippoorwhill. O' how I yearn from in my breast, To summon forth at my behest, Odes of passion, a bard's refrain, So that your love, shall e'er remain. But I am not on distant shore, Nor am I bard from days of yore, But yet I know of what I seek, So of my love to you I speak. Thou art my Venus, Goddess of the night, Thy bloom outshines the welkin light, I long to hold you in my arms, Feel gentle touch of goddess charms, Thou beauty doth mine soul entwine, Sweet creature of the night divine. Fair Rose, unto mine heart entreat, Entice me with thy nectar sweet, Quench the yearnings deep inside, Upon cool breeze of eventide, Come sail with me on winds of time, As sing to thee, my love in rhyme. For I love Rose, for evermore, As walk along a distant shore. [This message has been edited by Mike (edited 01-23-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Mike - All Rights Reserved | |||
wandering Member
since 2001-01-21
Posts 92 |
Mike, you rock with this one! great write. later, wandering lost in thought, found in words. wanderer |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Mike: "O' how I yearn from in my breast, To summon forth at my behest, Odes of passion, a bard's refrain, So that your love, shall e'er remain." You have done just that, my friend..with more charm because you're now. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Well, thank God you're not a bard of yore, 'cause if you were then you'd be dead now......hehehehe.....so much better being a bard of today, don't ya think? This is absolutely beautiful, Mike! I love it! Denise |
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David2 Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 407 |
Mike, I enjoyed this immensely. Your words complement one another beautifully. your meter and rhyme scheme are first rate also.Well done. David2 |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Mike, That's about as good as it gets. This one would rate anytime anywhere. Sy |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I long to hold you in my arms, Feel gentle touch of goddess charms, Thou beauty doth my soul entwine, Sweet creature of the night divine. Fair Rose, unto mine heart entreat, Entice me with your nectar sweet, Quench the yearnings deep inside, Upon cool breeze of eventide, Come sail with me on winds of time, As sing to thee, my love in rhyme. For I love Rose, for evermore, As walk along a distant shore. ================== thats it!!! ... Im changing my name to Rose LOL man oh man ... your just SO GOOD at this.. awesome vocab and cadence poet sir ...once again. Poetry is not an opinion expressed ... It is a song that rises from a bleeding wound ... or a smiling mouth. ~Kahlil Gibran~ |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
wandering...appreciate your reply...I have enjoyed your poetry that I have seen so far. Martie...*smile* thank you kind and gracious lady... Denise...a live bard vs. a dead bard...like they say... once you seen one bard, you seen em all...checking my pulse here.. hehe thank you my legal minded friend. David2 and Mr. Tabin... I am humbled by your responses as the two of you are exceptional poets. JanetMarie...how come everytime I see one of your responses, I end up smiling... this decrepit old man thanks you kindly...btw... didn't anyone tell you that your bloom isn't cottage cheese. |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
An excellent write with the flair of romantic charm... This read is truly a delight... Thank you *~coco~* |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
I truly appreciate you taking the time to read and reply to my poem Coco... glad you enjoyed. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, Mike~ Don't know how I missed this little jewel - 'Thou art my Venus, Goddess of the night, Thy bloom outshines the welkin light' But you can shine that welkin light on me anytime ! ! ! WOW ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
Awww, this is too cool! You put this in writing so well... I love to read others poetry esp. when it takes me where they are. Loved it! Sauni Sauni :) Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
Mike, this was fabulous, absolutely loved the style, Very unique in the format. Great work. Was in awe of! |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Mike, This is truly beautiful, you are a grifted writer, this must be one to go in to my library, thank you for the most enjoyable read. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Mike~ Beautiful piece, loved the images this one produced....thanks ~HUG~ Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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Rindercella Member
since 1999-11-12
Posts 64La La Land |
This is a most charming poem. You have used some very nice imagery. I believe my favorite lines would be "Thou beauty doth mine soul entwine, Sweet creature of the night divine." It sings a beautiful song. *If the shoe fits ... the castle is yours* |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Mike, You've woven such beauty, longing, desire and devotion so delicately with a grace that holds the reader close as you whisper the weave you etch into the heavens....this is stunning Mike...I'll be so glad when the archives are back up so that I can read all of my favorites again and againg~ You can swim in the waves of the weave...without sinking into the mind of the weaver~ |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
What a truly lovely ode to the fair Rose...and what a lucky lady she is We all have wings...some of us don't know why |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Your work, as always, is high quality. Beautifully done. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
There you go again, Mike - passing the proverbial gauntlet... and doing it pretty well, I might add... |
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