»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #12
»
Her presence (repost)
| Open Poetry #12 |
|
Her presence (repost) |
|
|
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Good morning Passions....I hope all is well....I wanna send shoutouts to all who read my last poem....it makes me feel like somebody cares for my poetry...anways, this is an old piece that's about a subject that y'll hardly see me write about cause, it's my weakness, my achilles heel....a thing called love...I guess I simply don't have too much love rhymes in me or something...anyways, I hope y'll enjoy the poem! The moment she walked in, her presence locked in. Man, I've never seen a girl so beautiful before. On a scale of one to ten, I give her a twenty-four! With her creamy white skin, that beautiful face, and that hourglass figure, homegirl had me fiegning for her, like a bottle of liquor! Everyone in the room had their jaws dropped, as this young girl shimmied around, in her silky halter top. Man, she was one sexy fox and I feared, that if I continued to stare, my eyes would eventually go "pop" like a jack-in-a-box. Man, I wanted to get with her real bad and I would give it all I had, to get her attention so that I can dwell, in her lovely dimension cause my desires for her, burn like hell as her presence, is all in the beauty of essence. Baby got back, she's all that, and a bag of chips, with her banging hips, and those juicy lips, she could make an acrobat do, 100 flips. Man if she was mine, I would treat her divine, and make her so satisfied, that she would never leave my side, till the the day I'm die, and even when I die, she'll still be mine cause eventually, we'll meet again in heaven, and once again, our love will rain heart and roses, with a smile of encouragement from God, and a heart-touching comment from Moses. |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Nate Dogg - All Rights Reserved | |||
Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
loved it nate..i think i missed it the first time around..thanks for posting again  ~V~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
||
|
snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
Very cool, nate! I could hear the rhythm as if someone was reading it aloud. I like this a lot!! sp  I won't go; I won't sleep; I can't breathe until you're resting here with me... |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Nate, my friend~ Well, this one will do quite nicely, sir ! I caught myself rapping it and it sounded real fine to me. 'On a scale of one to ten, I give her a twenty-four!' Gotta LOVE that math ! It all adds up to a great, fun write ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
||
|
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
(smiling uncontrollably) Thank you Snowpants and especially Marge....both of your comments have addened to this wonderful day I'm having today as we celebrate Mr. King's birthday...hey Marge, you should repost your King's dedication poem...I know I loved it...well I gotta go and thanks you to for the sweet comments...bye! Nathan |
||
|
Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
emotions with a beat. i like 'em like that. intense and funny. very smooth. i'm just learning how to smile; that's not easy to do. -Art P. Alexakis |
||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
She definately seems to be the woman you need to meet to stir up the passion within your romantic beat...James |
||
|
maxtec1 Senior Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 577Garland, Tx |
WOW great writing by the way does she have a sister. Love and light, Richard |
||
|
dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
NATE DOGGY DOG.. yeah..i'm with marge..i gotta rap it when i read you  me and the fat boys gettin the groove  (sorry, i'm a bit of an old dog..i like the old rappers lol!)love this nate! and this part gave me a chuckle: "...Baby got back, she's all that, and a bag of chips, with her banging hips, and those juicy lips, she could make an acrobat do, 100 flips..." flippin for ya nate.. keep writin and i'll keep rappin with ya hugs, g"oh baby baby, its a wild world..its hard to get by just upon a smile..." cat stevens |
||
|
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
*smiles* here Nathan...very cool! Your last lines were awesome...the subject of "Love" is not one of my strong suits so I feel for ya but I'd say you wear it well!! Great writing ~ You can swim in the waves of the weave...without sinking into the mind of the weaver~ |
||
|
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
I wanna say a sincere thanks to all those who posted a reply....peace! Nathan |
||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Nate~ this is really a fun....easy way to express desire.......I enjoyed this very much......it's very musical...... -SEA |
||
|
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Thank you sea, for your wonderful comments. Nathan |
||
Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
awwwww another romantic......to be so adored....Wonderful, just wonderful... Greeneyes~ *** "Within you I lose myself Without you I find myself Wanting to be lost again." -Unknown |
||
|
CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
NAT, the last two lines had me in sighs... A sweet write PoetFriend and I thank you for the re-post as I never got to see this on first round... *~coco~* |
||
|
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Thank you Greeneyes and Coco, for your wonderful comments! Nathan |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
