Open Poetry #12 |
She catches the flakes with her lips... |
Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
She catches the flakes with her lips! Why wasn’t I born a flake? I could have been caught in a glimpse, Instead I am human and since, Us, humans, don’t fall from the sky I might as well melt and dry. She wears an expensive perfume! Why couldn’t I be that drop? I’d fall on her cheek and bloom, Instead I just wander in gloom. All alone, in the world-- my cell. I might as well never smell. She says that she loves the moon, Why wasn’t I born a beam? I could have just made her swoon, Instead I’m a man and soon, The moon will arise and shine And again, she will not be mine. And I guess that I have no chance... Why don’t I have any luck? But at least I can still steal a glance, And carefully watch her dance With another as all the lights dim,-- Why could I just be him? ------------------ Check out more of my poetry here: http://www.unknownpoets.com/db/authors/master [This message has been edited by Master (edited 01-13-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved | |||
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Very nicely done Master ... you've carried your theme through beautifully throughout ... such a lovely rendition of unrequited love. Best wishes, /Kit |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thanks Kit, I'm glad you liked it! Check out my poetry here: http://www.unknownpoets.com/db/authors/master |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Master I always appreciate your translations...but when you write your own... you touch them... well done! |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Master~ Lonely piece but penned so beautifully..well done Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thanx! |
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Pixydust Junior Member
since 2001-01-14
Posts 36 |
Master, this was written very well. It's like I could feel everything you felt. I really enjoyed your openness...nice work |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
You are just a poet who writes to her a verse that tells of how you feel this is not a curse |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
ah..the unrequited love..it hurts so good... enjoyed reading hugs, g "a love declared for days to come, is as good as none" -tracy chapman |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
MASTER, the tenderness expressed in this poem just clutched upon my heart... A splendid write and I thank you for the enjoyable read... ~*coco*~ |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Master, I like this lament and the way you carried the theme. Good show. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Master this is fantastic and romantic...what a combination...James |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thank you all for your comments! I'm glad you enjoyed this one! |
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