She catches the flakes with her lips...

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Master
Senior Member

since 1999-08-18

Posts 1867
Boston, MA

0 posted 2001-01-13 09:21 PM

She catches the flakes with her lips!
Why wasn’t I born a flake?
I could have been caught in a glimpse,
Instead I am human and since,
Us, humans, don’t fall from the sky
I might as well melt and dry.

She wears an expensive perfume!
Why couldn’t I be that drop?
I’d fall on her cheek and bloom,
Instead I just wander in gloom.
All alone, in the world-- my cell.
I might as well never smell.

She says that she loves the moon,
Why wasn’t I born a beam?
I could have just made her swoon,
Instead I’m a man and soon,
The moon will arise and shine
And again, she will not be mine.

And I guess that I have no chance...
Why don’t I have any luck?
But at least I can still steal a glance,
And carefully watch her dance
With another as all the lights dim,--
Why could I just be him?

------------------
Check out more of my poetry here:
http://www.unknownpoets.com/db/authors/master

[This message has been edited by Master (edited 01-13-2001).]

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

1 posted 2001-01-13 09:28 PM

Very nicely done Master ... you've carried your theme through beautifully throughout ... such a lovely rendition of unrequited love.

Best wishes,
/Kit

Master
Senior Member

since 1999-08-18

Posts 1867
Boston, MA

2 posted 2001-01-13 10:57 PM

Thanks Kit, I'm glad you liked it!

Check out my poetry here:

http://www.unknownpoets.com/db/authors/master

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2001-01-13 11:30 PM

Master I always appreciate your translations...but when you write your own...

you touch them...

well done!

tracie66
Member Elite

since 2000-01-18

Posts 4713
Australia

4 posted 2001-01-13 11:34 PM

Master~
Lonely piece but penned so beautifully..well done
Tracie~

Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe

Master
Senior Member

since 1999-08-18

Posts 1867
Boston, MA

5 posted 2001-01-14 12:56 PM

Thanx!

Pixydust
Junior Member

since 2001-01-14

Posts 36

6 posted 2001-01-14 01:09 AM

Master, this was written very well. It's like I could feel everything you felt. I really enjoyed your openness...nice work

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

7 posted 2001-01-14 01:50 AM

You are just a poet
who writes to her a verse
that tells of how you feel
this is not a curse

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

8 posted 2001-01-14 01:55 AM

ah..the unrequited love..it hurts so good...

enjoyed reading

hugs, g

"a love declared for days to come, is as good as none" -tracy chapman

CocoBaci
Member Elite

since 2000-05-06

Posts 3043

9 posted 2001-01-14 01:59 AM

MASTER, the tenderness expressed in this poem just clutched upon my heart...
A splendid write and I thank you for the enjoyable read...
~*coco*~

Krawdad
Member Elite

since 2001-01-03

Posts 2597

10 posted 2001-01-14 02:10 AM

Master,
I like this lament and the way you carried the theme. Good show.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

11 posted 2001-01-14 04:34 AM

Master this is fantastic and romantic...what a combination...James

Master
Senior Member

since 1999-08-18

Posts 1867
Boston, MA

12 posted 2001-01-14 01:19 PM

Thank you all for your comments! I'm glad you enjoyed this one!

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