Open Poetry #12 |
Welcome, Confusion and Chaos to my Haven, My Mind |
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Don't you understand that I can't let you in? There are too many in this crowded mind, And the last thing I need is another memory, To take up permanent residence here. I'd just like to fade away, Into the night shadows to be free, From the light that often shines on me, And my supposed glowing appetite, For niceness and total resilience. Poignantly displaced and reeling, From the blows to my ultimate control. Once again you got in to my thoughts, And it will take a mental exterminator, To release you, And keep you from chewing away at my sanity. Nightmares blend with my haven, My realm of dreams, and there is no escape, From this as I try to shake you. See.. I'm SHAKING you... Shaking this... Its.. Not.. Working.. And I'm defeated again. |
||
© Copyright 2001 Jennifer - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
WOW! Awesome write! -SEA |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Don't you understand that I can't let you in? There are too many in this crowded mind, And the last thing I need is another memory, To take up permanent residence here. I'd just like to fade away, Into the night shadows to be free, From the light that often shines on me, And my supposed glowing appetite, For niceness and total resilience. Poignantly displaced and reeling, From the blows to my ultimate control. ================= whoa...you been walking around in my head! you've expressed the chaos well ...makes perfect poetic sense. well done poetess ... cool write If my slight Muse do please these curious days ... The pain be mine ... but thine shall be the praise. ~Shakespeare~ |
||
kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
Once again you got in to my thoughts, And it will take a mental exterminator, To release you, And keep you from chewing away at my sanity. ___________________________________________ These lines are terrific. I enjoyed all of this poem, but this part really grabbed me. Nice writing! To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I liked this much...had a teacher once, who told me that emotions are like sand in a glass of water...and the alternatives were to be very still and hope that nothing shakes the glass? Or you could start removing the sand from the water grain by grain...sorry, I digress, but is what your poem reminded me of, and I did need to think about that right now, so thank you! Enjoyed. |
||
Robert Joseph Member
since 2000-10-07
Posts 491South Carolina |
Temptress, each word built into a soul depleting finally, excellent work. Robert Joseph |
||
Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I can feel the frustration in this one. . . excellent. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
||
insect Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014 |
If you don’t mind Is it Ok if I come into your replys Very thought provoking read You may have been defeated but you haven’t lost your mind. Ha! Great write Temptress |
||
snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
'There are too many in this crowded mind, And the last thing I need is another memory, To take up permanent residence here. I'd just like to fade away, Into the night shadows to be free, From the light that often shines on me,' Oh, how I understand this! You've penned this perfectly, Temptress! Love it! sp Never leave me, never go... I need you here, I need to know... You will always be Close to me |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |