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Another 3 a.m.
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Another 3 a.m. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana 
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A poem batters at my brain Full of such sorrow, screams of pain. This time, I can’t obey my muse - I’ll pull up covers and refuse! But dancing before my closed eyes Is one I loved whose horrid lies Stripped me of hope, destroyed esteem How can I wake up from this dream? My shaking hands sort through CD’s I need some soothing music, please To drown the sounds of a small girl As straight into that hell she’s hurled. I plot revenge - castration, too But worms are long since through with you. This hatred I keep buried deep Visits tonight, disturbs my sleep. In just a few more hours the dawn Will find this sniveling creature gone Till then, I’ll hug my pillow tight Soak it with tears, wait for the light. |
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| © Copyright 2001 suthern - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Wow........what emotion and spilling of sorrow this one is. Very heartfelt indeed and one I think most of us can relate to in one way or another. I myself don't sleep much but now I think it is a matter of habit but it all started out in times such as these. Wonderful expression from you pen and the cadence was outstanding when read aloud. If you find yourself stranded in a storm ...then reach for my hand and we will play in the puddles together |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Very emotionally intense poem...I hope that daylight found the demons gone...for with this poem you have surely purged some of that feeling from your heart. Hugs! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Suthern girl, this was not light reading....but it was exceptional writing. Castration is a very unkind cut!!  Funny how the worst things spur us into writing our best poetry, isn't it? This is very good, my good buddy who I hope NEVER dreams of me that way!!!! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I have goosebumps....every word of this I have lived...every single word. Insominia, nightmares, and even now as I type this? trembling hands...I cannot tell you how moved I am by this. |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Wow! You communicate your pain effectively in this. Sometimes we just have to let the storm run its course. Can I be your willful breeze, Come to touch, Your heart to ease? |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Mark - You honor me by taking the time to read it aloud... Thank you so much! *S* Martie - Some demons never leave... you just enjoy the occasional reprieve. *S* Thank you very much for the read and the hugs! *S* Deer One - A comment such as "exceptional writing" from you almost makes me forgive the blasted insomniac muse who insisted this be written! LOL Thank you! As for my dreams, I promise any of you will bring smiles. (And for the benefit of Toe and LJA, that was SMILES, not laughter! *G*) You guys and a few other exceptional men with great integrity have done so much to restore my faith and make most of my dreams good ones... and I thank you. *S* And unkind as the cut may be, I suspect you agree even that's too good for someone who'd deliberately harm a child. serenity - I cannot tell you how moved I am by your response.... or how sad I am that you understand so thoroughly. My thank you comes with hugs! ooops... Sorry, Temptress. *G* You slipped in while I was typing... a process that's almost as slow as my thinking! LOL. Thanks for reading! [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 01-27-2001).] |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Been there..usually I don't go to sleep in the first place though..I pace all night, working up my anger and frustration. This is exceptional!!  |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
yipes yuh woohoo on the tough stuffness and perfect rhythm |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing, Suthern. I'm sorry that you had to suffer so much pain. HUGS Denise |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Suthern~ I got a hug for you~ What an intense piece of writing. So very well done, sweet poetess. May you not know the visit of this tormented creature upon your slumber again. *HUGS* Love you. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
this is not the first one of your poems to effect me so deeply ... I have read this pain before, and once again you express it with such impact and wrenching emotion ... that the reader is left shaken and lost for what to say ... proof of the fact that you are a gifted poet. This subject is one that hits close and holds my heart, FAR TOO MANY people whom I love live with this pain, with these losses. the lasting scars and long term effects break my heart, wrap it up in rhyme and purge it baby .. we heal as we write. love and hugs to ya me girlie |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
The intensity of the emotions in this one is exceptional.....powerful writing! The capture of the overpowering hurt and pain and sadness is excellent!....well done! |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
PDV: My sister used to tease me that she could guage my state of mind by the cleanliness of my oven... as much as I like to cook, if the oven was spotless, it was time to call for the men in the white coats! LOL. Walt: If you saw me trying to dance, you'd swear I had NO rhythm! LOL Apparently these feet remained Baptist long after the rest of me went renegade. *G* dsynder & Marge: You are both so very kind... and the hugs are much appreciated! *S* And Marge... I hope so too! *S* JM: And the effects don't go away just because they're ignored... it's one of those subjects where the victims feel the shame no matter how much they shouldn't... Love and hugs back atcha, dear lady! *S* ethome: What a wonderful response... thank you so much! *S* Thank you all, each and every one... your kind responses leave me trembling once again... but it's a completely different sensation from that left by nightmares. *S* [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 01-27-2001).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Late to get in on the exceptionals...except to say...thank you... I never went through anything like this, but it doesn't mean that I didn't feel your intensity... so tell me why, please....do I wake at 3:00 a.m. and write?... Thank you Suthern, for sharing something so vastly personal... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Ah, Sunshine... such a compliment is never too late! *S* Thank you! (And whatever keeps you awake and writing, we're grateful. *G*) |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
suthern, Ouch! I felt this deep within me and it touched a cord. Powerful emotional write, deserving of Balladeer's "exceptional". And as for me when my kitchen floor is scrubbed spotless...ditto. write on, because you can Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
I can only say I know...we each have different demons that we face in different ways...I sleep when I can no longer keep my eyes open...and thank God every day for thids blasted computer and a place like this to run to |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
well I of all people know how contrary muses can be, and if sadness is what keeps your muse quiet I can understand, but dang girl, its a shame to keep a muse as good as your silent.... you sure can write!!...guess sometimes even a sad muse has to stand up and scream...whew... big big hugs lady  [This message has been edited by Corazon (edited 01-29-2001).] |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Oh, my heavens! *S* Yanno... I wouldn't have been nearly as upset with my muse if I'd known that obeying would drag Corazon out of hiding! *G* Great to see you, sweet lady... I can't tell you how much I miss you... but I hope you know! *S* Kethry: As much as I hate to cause you more pain, your Ouch means much to me... thank you! Paula: For giving us a place to deal with the nights, Ron should be knighted! *S* We're all grateful. Thank you all so very much!!! *S* |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
excellent suthern. . . I felt this one. . . well done. . . ------------------------------------------------------ To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Suthern~ I know this kind of 3 am, it isn't pleasant.....but wow....you wrote of it perfectly -SEA |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
some people say life begins at 3am... for those who never sleep it's just another afternoon at the office. i find myself viewing sleep as an overrated commodity, my best thinking coming at 3am. but it usually is packaged in such horrors and fears. a strange and steep price for creativity. you have captured many writers' realties wonderfully. huddled under cover, choking on emotion/memory and tryin to scribble it down. a marvelous write. talkin 'bout reflections... this is real one, ponytail. diggin it. You gotta love livin, cause dyin's a pain in the ass. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Ethan: But sleep is such a marvelous escape from having to think... if only poems and nightmares would cooperate! *G* Thank you! And thank you, Sven and SEA... so very much! |
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laryalee Member
since 2000-06-19
Posts 352Alberta, Canada |
I'm glad I found this one - I must add my own admiration for your words and your courage. One of your comments to a reply really grabbed me: "Some demons never leave...you just enjoy the occasional reprieve." How sadly true. Thank you for sharing part of your pain. Lary |
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