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Open Poetry #11
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RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL

0 posted 2000-12-16 07:18 PM



The Pain of Eyes


Most it seems are content
to engage in small talk
a verbal banter
like fighters in a contest
dancing around the ring
for a prize
that for the most part
is measured in bruises.
Though, if one explores
the depth of conversation
beyond the fringe areas
and past the fences
we build around our existence,
there lie treasures
that defy the imagination.

On one such journey
I happened to discover
in the tone of your voice
the pain of your eyes
and felt your hurt
in my heart.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



© Copyright 2000 RobertB - All Rights Reserved
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
1 posted 2000-12-16 07:22 PM


Very well written/said, my friend, and so true for so many.  My applause to you.

jwesley

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
2 posted 2000-12-16 09:28 PM



Wow - very well said!  This really made me pause and think how sadly true your words are.  This is a simple but brilliant sociological poem and I'm printing out a copy for myself to keep!  

~Melissa~


The beauty of poetry gives my soul wings to fly free within dreams



Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2000-12-16 09:36 PM


RobertB~

'if one explores
the depth of conversation'


'there lie treasures
that defy the imagination.'


This is a wonderful write -
and if you could see my eyes -
you would know -
it touched my heart.

It's so good to see you here !
You do stay gone too long !
Welcome home !
Happy Holidays, RobertB~
~*Marge*~




~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

4 posted 2000-12-16 10:45 PM


On one such journey
I happened to discover
in the tone of your voice
the pain of your eyes
and felt your hurt
in my heart.

Enjoying reading Robert..Happy holidays
to you..

                ~Victoria~



A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
- Paul Valery (1871-1945)


RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
5 posted 2000-12-17 09:22 AM


Thanks very much jwesley.

Melissa, your comments made me stop and think on my poem. That is the hardest for me...to stop and reflect on my own words at times!

Marge, this IS home. I do not understand why I keep trodding off to foreign lands to fight poetry battles with those who have no desire to change.

Victoria, I appreciate the excerpt that moved you.


I appreciate all of you.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Lady Lightning
Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 422
Kentucky
6 posted 2000-12-17 10:16 AM


I don't think I've had the chance to read any of your work yet, but I surely will after this one..This was written with such truth for so many...     ~LL~< !signature-->

The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost.  author unknown

[This message has been edited by Lady Lightning (edited 12-17-2000).]

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
7 posted 2000-12-17 10:29 AM


loooook deep into my eyyyyes..... are you getting sleepy yet? NO? oh phooey! so much for that! i was trying to hypnotize you to learn the secrets behind the poetry.... oh well!

your poem has a hypnotizing effect on the reader (did i spell that right? hmmmm) ... any way, missed reading you, glad your back, stay a while and forget the poetry battles, that's not good for a writer as talented as you  

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
8 posted 2000-12-17 10:51 AM


very insightful with sincere depth...good writing!!  I loved the end I know it's happened to me and I can feel it for someone. Write on!    ethome
snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
9 posted 2000-12-17 11:33 AM


It takes a person who truly cares to see the hurt inside.  Great writing!  Really enjoyed this!  

sp


I won't go; I won't sleep; I can't breathe until you're resting here with me...

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
10 posted 2000-12-17 03:27 PM


Lady....I thank you. I hope that inspiration will return to me and you may perhaps read more of me.

Doreen.....I really do have to quit trying to make others that cannot feel...feel. It is uninpiring and tiring.

snowpants....I do feel sometimes too much. I am trying to temper it.


ethome.....hello again!

Robert


if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

11 posted 2000-12-17 04:12 PM


Though, if one explores
the depth of conversation
beyond the fringe areas
and past the fences
we build around our existence,

Absolutely wonderful!  

Maree

"If my words could blanket the skies
and fill every corner and crevice of
this earth, still this wouldn't be enough"
"Maree Russo"


serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

12 posted 2000-12-17 04:15 PM


Hey stranger...there ya go again...every now and then you sneak back in here and "wow" us all again...

"depth of conversation"?

hmmm...would that there were some of that around here (and no, I do not mean the forum)...grin...welcome home, m'friend.
Happy holidays to you.
and a merry C

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
13 posted 2000-12-17 04:44 PM


oh my...the depth of conversation
leaves it all up to our imagination.
love this wonderful piece.

Charisma

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
14 posted 2000-12-17 06:29 PM


Serenity, Maree and Charisma I thank you.

I have been to a place far too long that only appreciates what certain "leaders" say  should be appreciated.

This is home and you are family.

Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
15 posted 2000-12-17 10:05 PM


RobertB...I think your words were made for me on this day. It amazes me how "not alone" I feel when reading your words and those of others, that in their own special way touch me deep inside my heart. Thank you for sharing your heart with us, and especially today.

huggzz

~Wynter


"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II


RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
16 posted 2000-12-18 07:33 AM


Wynter,

We are never alone.

Whether online on in real life, we are never left to ourselves.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

17 posted 2000-12-18 09:21 AM


Thank you for sharing these thoughts, they are quite profound, makes one think.

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day,
so I never have to live without you."

Winnie the Pooh



RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
18 posted 2000-12-18 01:37 PM


Thinking is poetry...poetry is thinking!

Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Cassandra
Junior Member
since 2000-12-16
Posts 48
Charlotte, North Carolina, USA
19 posted 2000-12-18 01:48 PM


Enjoyable piece and beautifully written! Happy Holidays to you and yours!

--Cassandra

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
20 posted 2000-12-18 02:20 PM


Hi Cassandra......

I am so glad you enjoyed it.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Ramses
Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40
Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway
21 posted 2000-12-18 02:24 PM


RobertB...

Isn`t it strange what lies hidden in the most secret of places?
But only through searching for the keys to these private doors we can see the beauty or the sorrow whitin....
Great poem, keep sharing..

Ramses

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
22 posted 2000-12-18 02:35 PM


Ramses I agree......we just have to look to see secrets.

Many never look.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Words_of_Glitter
Member
since 2000-10-25
Posts 90
USA
23 posted 2000-12-18 06:19 PM


Wow, that was an amazing piece and it's so true. Most of the time, people ask, "How are you?" and don't care much to hear the reply. They just do it out of politeness, not concern. Your poem was about that...and you show a true understanding of the suffering of other human beings. How selfless. I loved this poem. One of the best that I've read in months. Wow...Wow. That's enough.

"Do not marry the one that you can live with. Marry the one you cannot live without."

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
24 posted 2000-12-18 06:25 PM


Hi Words.....it is a poem of true life.

I know this wonderful girl and we were laughing at a party on a Saturday night.

The next morning her sister was in the hospital near death. Just to look into her eyes from across the room told me that something terrible had happened since our laughter of the previous evening.

Robert


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