Open Poetry #11 |
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Name of the Game |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart ![]() |
Name of the Game living on the edge of opaque transparency might you see through, within the skin of me might you view, compelled, the written words of me might you then be dispelled, and be repelled by me? if I wrote a little piece, a poem or some prose colored it with rainbows, decorated with a rose sprinkle in some sunshine, tag it with a funny line would you really then know which words were all mine? say there was no byline, no signature nor sign what if I left out those parts of me, especially a sigh should perhaps I leave without the innermost of me would you then come and look and read the poetry? I think I may be most transparent when I think and write of you you inhabit all of my inner me it's what you like to do but when you look in this heart of mine and see something special, a little shine think then perhaps I'm not so obsequious when I make grand attempts to write of us but please do go now one step beyond this transparency that you lean upon this paper thin skin that you have rent and keep in mind that as the willow is bent that no matter what it is I write I shall go on, through day and night I shall survive, even if I am one and know that I may never become undone so will you know me with no name? you may, if you continue with the game. Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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© Copyright 2000 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marsha![]()
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Kari, this is utterly amazing, a truly outstanding piece of work from you. This is one of your very very best. This is brilliant, incandescent, luminous, it really shines. Just like your heart love. Would we know it was yours without your name? YES we would indeed, it has a special glow all of your own. Truly stunning love Take care Majestic Marsha ![]() Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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liquidphantasy Junior Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 15california |
This is really really good! ![]() Who wrote this? Was it me? ![]() Anyway, I've been having the exact same thoughts lately! Oh, and I really love the word "obsequious". You have added to my vocabulary and have also offered some excellent poetry to ease my heart and make me realize I am not alone in my thinking. Excellent work, Ms. Sunshine! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Wow! One of your best and most powerful! ![]() |
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Interloper![]() ![]()
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
say there was no byline, no signature nor sign what if I left out those parts of me, especially a sigh should perhaps I leave without the innermost of me would you then come and look and read the poetry? ================================ Absolutely! You are the most amazing .... Live for love. Without love, you don't live. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
No trite comment I could make would do justice to this poem...so let me just sit here, smile and quietly applaud... |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Karilea~ *Hugs* for the lady behind this piece ~ the poetess that is you ... 'should perhaps I leave without the innermost of me' Oh never, mam ... never should you leave at all. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Marsha, I think YOU would know me, nameless or otherwise...and I applaud you my little one...for never being fair-weather...thank you... liquidphantasy...we are not alone...we just think we are...until we follow a dream...then we soar...thank you... PdV...kind words from you, indeed...thank you very much... Interloper...OK, you've got me asking...amazing...what? {~,^}...thank you... 'Deer...you caught the curtsey, I'm sure?...thank you... Marge, believe me, you have taught me that it is OK to look within...and I thank YOU for that... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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Marsha![]()
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Kari love, as you would know me, even if I was to post under one of my other names, I know. This is a stunning piece love it really and truly is, as I've said before you are soaring, and I love to see you fly so high and beautifully. (This morning, I had the site all to myself, I felt like a child in a sweetshop. All the goodies laid out and just me to taste them all. Utterly wonderful, unfortunately I didn't have long because I had to go to work. Still it was glorious, and I'm sure I left my heart prints all over the place.) Take care Majestic Marsha ![]() Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
and just like a child in a sweet shop Marsha, you double-dipped! Aren't you our treasure!? Hugs... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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Charisma![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
outstanding, love and enjoyed reading it. Charisma |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
Very interesting, the most original one I've read in a long time, Sunshine! "Always be a first rate version of your self instead of a second rate version of someone else." Marilyn Monroe |
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Sven![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I would just have to see your light my friend. . . Beautiful. .. ![]() ------------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sven, Irish, Charisma...there's no pulling the wool over your eyes is there...thank you all for your comments of light, originality, and the read... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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