Open Poetry #11 |
holding pattern (or do I really need this?) |
desperado Member
since 1999-05-24
Posts 312FT Hood,Tx |
floating through the autumn breeze descending with relative ease doing the things I do to please the feelings inside me that bind and squeeze drifting down an inward spiral to a destination never to be final carried by the winds of my desires and dreams floating here forever it seems trapped in a holding pattern of love and life a life filled with turmoil and strife twisting and turning as the wind blows going to a place only hell knows reacting to things I couldn't see setting the limits I choose upon me swirling in the air made sharp by the cold fighting with defiance made fresh and old dancing on air through gale and gusts taunting and teasing in an effort of lusts mired in a life of reaction to fate in a world where on time is late destined to live with out a mate in the dreams of a leaf's autumn date "There were times in my life when I was going insane tryin to walk through the pain when I lost my grip and I hit the floor yeah I thought I cou |
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© Copyright 2000 James Webster - All Rights Reserved | |||
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Don't think you need it ..you write very well and that's expression man it means you can do what you want to do by cultivating independent thinking without hurting others. I wouldn't worry bout the rest it will all fall into place....ethome...... |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
"A world where on time is late..." That's us.. Good one, James.. |
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Saxoness
since 1999-07-18
Posts 1102Texas |
See, I told ya I'd be back today, didn't I? Ok, lets see what I have to say about this poem. I really like the lines "doing the things I do to please the feelings inside me that bind and squeeze" Seems like I get stuck in this pattern all of the time. Another part that I enjoyed was "dancing on air through gale and gusts taunting and teasing in an effort of lusts" Um...just liked that a lot. lol Good poem. I had this image of you floating on the wind like a leaf, trying to go this way and that, but not being able to, because emotions and feelings were stronger and pulling you in different directions, and so you ended up stuck in place. Good job, don't have a response poem this time, but, I am working on something you may find amusing lol. Ttyl< !signature--> "Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me." [This message has been edited by Saxoness (edited 11-19-2000).] |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Very captivating piece, Des. I loved the way it carried me. Nice writing as usual. ((hugs)) [This message has been edited by Temptress (edited 11-18-2000).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
twisting and turning as the wind blows going to a place only hell knows reacting to things I couldn't see setting the limits I choose upon me swirling in the air made sharp by the cold fighting with defiance made fresh and old dancing on air through gale and gusts taunting and teasing in an effort of lusts mired in a life of reaction to fate in a world where on time is late destined to live with out a mate in the dreams of a leaf's autumn date ================== this is a really cool poem... so many excellent lines... so many emotions well defined... and the title is perfect...it does feel like a holding pattern when we are at this point in our lives... "reacting to things I couldn't see setting the limits I choose upon me" there is a lot of truth and wisdom to those lines... very well done... jm |
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