The Crush of Water - pipTalk Forums

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PoeticKnight
Senior Member

since 2000-01-20

Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA

0 posted 2000-10-05 12:36 PM

I want to touch the immortal water
With all that I am, and these mortal hands
I see beauty in all that is nature
Wrap myself to sleep, this drowning man
The waves calling softly I hear my name
Ever increasing, cascading noise
Pulling me to the windswept shore to see,
Myself, in unacquainted poise
Much like outer space this is,
Dreams of what lies so far down below
Makes me yearn for rest in its arms,
In deeper and deeper shades of shadow
Yet, for one time only would I dare
To immerse myself in this way
For time, cruel time, has no mercy,
And remembers not how drowned I am today

jinxed
Member

since 2000-09-27

Posts 86

1 posted 2000-10-05 12:42 PM

i like this, specially cause i can really relate...sigh...but the images are great and the ending specially touching

JP
Senior Member

since 1999-05-25

Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

2 posted 2000-10-05 12:43 PM

I often feel the desire to succomb to the din that is thrashing wildly about me. Find the beauty in its lure, but find the deity in our ability to rise above.

I liked this peice a lot.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
JP

Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so.
B. Russell

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

3 posted 2000-10-05 09:51 PM

sometimes, the water can be too much. . .

excellent my friend. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite

since 2000-03-06

Posts 3733
Michigan

4 posted 2000-10-05 10:08 PM

PK* This was a piece that I had to read over
several times...I didn't want to miss one
thing in it. Powerful work~

doreen peri
Member Elite

since 1999-05-25

Posts 3812
Virginia

5 posted 2000-10-05 10:24 PM

quote:
For time, cruel time, has no mercy,
And remembers not how drowned I am today

hey now... this was really a piece of work... excellent imagery, pensive, provocative and full of truth

PoeticKnight
Senior Member

since 2000-01-20

Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA

6 posted 2000-10-06 09:18 AM

wow....thank you all for the comments. I never looked at it in the way some of you do. That's what is so great about your feedback. I always like to see someone else's take on things.

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