Open Poetry #10 |
![]() ![]() |
untitled (inspired by Shakespeare's "romeo and juliet |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
Jeffrey Carter![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! ![]() |
Dear sweet love, shall I wait for thee Until the moon's beams no longer shine Shall I bid thee farely well And hope to find thee again another day For the night's dark hath come to set upon thee And I can do naught 'sept wait the morn's light Yet, in the days brightness I am but a blind man I, shalt not swear by the moon For it is too inconstant in it's path I, swear to thee by mine own name That my love will be with thee always |
||
© Copyright 2000 Jeffrey D. Carter - All Rights Reserved | |||
Victoria![]()
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
wonderful Sir Jeffrey..thou art a fine poet. ~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
||
Celeste Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597 |
a beautiful declaration of love.........really nice job with this! To capture and live a moment is truly living |
||
mariee66 Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596Recess, OfYourMind |
Now tell the truth, were you watching Shakespeare in Love??? Kidding ![]() This is very different, but I like! Marie~ |
||
Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Jeff, William would be proud of thou'. |
||
juliet_2u Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125North Carolina |
Well I must say, I am quiet impressed. I know William well ya know and he would be honored...lol. Nice job Jeff. Juls |
||
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Hey Jeffery you did a wonderful job here!! You captured old Willy's tongue and placed a beauty on the page...good writing! Just a point of interest...nothing to do with your poem. Did you know that one of the best known passages in world literature is Shakespeare's " O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo?" Yet, most people misinterpret it. Juliet is not asking "Where are you Romeo?" she is asking, "Why are you Romeo? (why couldn't you be someone else so we could marry? The next lines are, "Deny thy father, and refuse thy name: Or,if thou wilt not, be but my sworn love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet.)In Elizabethan England, wherefore was the common word for why. We cannot possibly know that ( and many other changes like it) unless someone tells us the difference, and so we rely on a specialist, usually an English teacher or professor. Just an interesting little point that very few know...check it out with your next door Shakspearean scholar and he'll tell you it's so. take care....ethome.... |
||
Jeffrey Carter![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
Thanks all of you ![]() And thank you ethome for pointing that out...learn something new everyday ![]() Just thought I'd include my favorite passage from "Romeo and Juliet" It is within the same scene as the one ethome mentions above ... But to be frank, and give it thee again. And yet I wish but for the thing I have: My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite. This is Juliet speaking from the window down to where Romeo is hiding in the brush. Ahhh...What romance there is in these few words! |
||
Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
Wonderful poem. I'm a big shakespeare reader myself and love the play Romeo and Juliet and it feels good to regard a fellow person who reads some Shakespeare outside academic regards, for sheer personal enjoyment. Nicely written. regards, Poeminister "...no single sound too rude upon thy slumber shall intrude, Our thoughts, our souls- O God above! In every deed shall mingle, love." -Poe |
||
LoveBug![]()
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
Jeffrey, this is a beautiful piece. "Romeo and Juliet" is my favorite play, and I just love how you've captured it in this piece. Keep up the great work! ![]() False gems may shine as brightly as the genuine article, but there are always those who can tell the difference. |
||
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Jeff, Thou has much talent for writing romance my friend. This was beautiful. ![]() Jenn Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
||
Jeffrey Carter![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
POeminister, LB, an Jen dar gracias muy mucho ![]() I do so love the works of Ole Willie ![]() |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Dear sweet love, shall I wait for thee Until the moon's beams no longer shine Shall I bid thee farely well And hope to find thee again another day For the night's dark hath come to set upon thee And I can do naught 'sept wait the morn's light ======== say hey....you are well inspired here.. excellent Jeff ... very cool verbiage and vocab here... ya did old Bill Shakes proud with this.. you should try a sonnet and use this style and vocab... youd be great at it... later-playing-with poetry-gator ![]() "What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly" Lao Tze Tao ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
||
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Great job with this jeffrey...and Janet said..."you are well inspired here", I say, you are Will inspired here. |
||
Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
oh, yeah! This is smooth "When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey."" Laurie Lee Kathleen |
||
Jeffrey Carter![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
Jan-gator....Ummmmm.....What's a sonnet? ![]() Martie....Hehe, yup I guess you're right ![]() Kathleen....Smooth huh? TYVM ![]() |
||
Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
I LOVE Shakespeare, makes you feel like your back in that time, you have did him justice, loved your poem. |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |