Open Poetry #10 |
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Moonlight's Spill |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
"Moonlight's Spill" We leave the clamor of the street long shadows laced in ivory light with leaves aswirl beneath our feet to stroll the pathways of the night Our talk is light in evening's chill as eyes betray unspoken thought but soon in glow of moonlight's spill in your embracing I am caught And in this moment's tender trance your lips brush, soft, upon my own then sudden grasp of bold advance an urgency I've never known And though I fight to free away, deny the whirling of my heart in ecstasy of love's delay to passion's pulsing we depart (to be continued...) (I hope!) Rainydays ![]() |
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© Copyright 2000 Rainydays - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Rainydays~ how beautiful........and fustrating! Loved this ![]() |
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cathybohannan Member
since 2000-07-31
Posts 140Paintsville,KY |
Sometimes you can't fight that feeling. Hope it continues for you too. Lovely poem. Cathy Marie Bohannan |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
so close...I hope you continue the story(the real one too)I'm waiting patiently Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
yes, yes, this is only part one... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
SEA, sorry about the frustration...believe me, I KNOW it! Tried writing more but just too distracted this morning. Will get there though! Thanks for reading! Cathy, who wants to fight it?? ![]() Ron, thank you. The real story... I'll have to work on that one. Thanks for reading. I'll share more as I find it...thanks for your patience! Sunshine, exactly. Thanks for reading and understanding. As Carson McCullers said, "the heart is a lonely hunter." This one is a work in progress, to be sure. ![]() Rainydays |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Don't look into my eyes as you will surely see Residing within are the secret passions of you Please don't use my eyes to reach the depths of me Or you will find a love that can only be true ================================ To see the whole thing you inspired...please go here. Thank you for your verse that inspired me for this one. /pip/Forum42/HTML/002410.html [This message has been edited by Mark Bohannan (edited 11-04-2000).] |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Rainydays, this has moonlight spilling all over it.Can't wait for the next installment. Kethry Growth demands a temporary surrender of security. Gail Sheehy |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
This is so perfect in every way The rhyming, the content, the phrasing I would hope this kind of writing will be continued forever In admiration of your talent Liz |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Our talk is light in evening's chill as eyes betray unspoken thought but soon in glow of moonlight's spill in your embracing I am caught And in this moment's tender trance your lips brush, soft, upon my own then sudden grasp of bold advance an urgency I've never known ================ excellent writing RD... youve taken the reader in well with the subtle sensuality and anticipation of this piece. and allow me to echo Liz's comments about structure and rhyme... cant ever go wrong quoting sweet Lizzie ![]() take care jm |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
Mark, thank you for your note this morning. I have just read your beautiful poem and am still smiling ~ even through the fever. ![]() Kethry, thank you so much for reading and for your nice comment. I will make it a point to try to have another installment for you this weekend, though often I am such a moody writer and go off on odd tangents. (something I'll bet we ALL do) Sometimes what I am immersed within, emotionally, is too close to write about just at that moment, and comes about at a later time. Do you find that to be true of your writing? Elizabeth, I thank you sincerely. Your words are kind and very much appreciated this morning. I am happy that you enjoyed reading and will be sure to share more as I "find" it. (or as it finds me) Janet Marie, thank you. I'm glad to know that you've enjoyed reading, and I appreciate you letting me know what you think. Rainydays |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
Your words strike home deep within me, reminding me of my own dreams....I'm waiting in anticipation of the next segment, because I can't wait to find out how the dream continues.....one thing I do know without a doubt, the dream will go on!!! Good work ![]() |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Rainydays - yes, yes, you must continue, as I wait in anticipation of the next wonderful segment. Bill |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
RainyDays~ Such a lovely spill of quill ... ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Rainy days--This is a very beautifully done poem...form and content equisitely executed. |
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A Whisper's Caress Senior Member
since 2000-11-03
Posts 791on the horizon of a fairytale |
Our talk is light in evening's chill as eyes betray unspoken thought How true this statement is. Very pretty telling of an exciting beginning. |
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Poet's Sister Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 80North Carolina |
Rainydays, This is so lovely and yes you have all of us panting for more. "the glow of moonlights spill" has to one of the most beautiful poetic phrases I have ever read. Thanks for this lovely write and yes, please quickly pen the sequel. ![]() |
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Elizabeth![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
There are some things we can't help but give in to...I'll be looking for the sequel, Rainydays! Elizabeth You cling to your ways and leave mine to me. Suum cuique. ~Elizabeth |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
This reminds me of my old girlfriend Billy Jean...we lived close together so we each walked halfway thru the moonlit night to meet each other and the feelings are lonely, than exciting, than romantic...James |
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