»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #7
»
Final Act
| Open Poetry #7 |
|
Final Act |
|
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Author's Note: I wrote this a long time ago...posting it now for my friend LoneWolf. Final Act Why must you raise your voice to me, When we are face-to-face? The love has left your deep-brown eyes: It's gone, without a trace. Why do I feel compelled to yell, To get my point across? My love has fled - and left, instead, An aching sense of loss. Your words are meant to hurt me, now - They do their job so well! What once had seemed like heaven Is now a living hell. My words, as well, are razor-sharp; They cut you to the bone. We fight like bitter enemies, With hearts as cold as stone. We used to share a thousand dreams; But, now, they all are gone. We die a little more, each day; It's pointless to go on. Our love is dead and in the grave; To part is now our fate: To try to save what's left of us, Before it is too late. -Troy J. Hoecherl- © Troy J Hoecherl All Rights Reserved Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Troy Hoecherl - All Rights Reserved | |||
LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
This is a great description of a dying love... I know this emotion well. Good job. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde |
||
|
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Troy, First of all thank you for the dedication. Very sweet of you!!  Excellent poem and very well written. I can feel your emotions loud and clear. Guess we are all there at one time or another unfortunately. I relate to this one...powerful. Thanks, my friend.....for everything. Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end. --Michael W. Smith |
||
|
David2 Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 407 |
Troy, Another great example of well written poetry full of honest emotion. I hope I don't offend you when I say our styles seem very similiar. I do enjoy your work. David2 |
||
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Such kind words - thanks, everyone! LoveBug - I wrote this when my first wife and I got divorced. It was a pretty dark period in my life... Lone Wolf - You're very welcome, my friend! And, you're right - we have all "been there, done that" in one way or another. Still hurts like hell when you are the one its happening to, though... David2 - Offend me, by comparing our poetry? You HONOR me, Mr. Talent!  Thanks again for all your kind words! Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
|
devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Talk about just "knowing"...this let some emotion out for me too Troy...I thank you!!! Some excellent writing here I must add!!! Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
||
|
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing, Troy! Very well expressed! Denise |
||
|
netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Troy - what a wonderful dedication to bring back past painful memories and share them for a friend in need -- is just wonderful Not to mention the poem is an excellent one. netswan |
||
|
mariee66 Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596Recess, OfYourMind |
This is very well written, Troy~ Emotions expressed so well~ Marie~ |
||
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Devina, Denise, Teresa, Marie - thank you all for your wonderful comments - you all made my day! Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
"What once had seemed like heaven.. is now a living hell." It is interesting how two people can be so close together and then drift so far apart. I once had a girlfriend that I didn't treat as well as I should have...but for about a year it seemed like I could do no wrong...no matter what I did she loved me more...but that second year...I started valueing the relationship...but no matter what I did she was never happy with me...and it was a living hell. There is a point of no return..I just experienced it within this past year..and some would call it the final act. This poem is fantastic. James |
||
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
James - glad you could relate! And it really is a tragedy when someone that you had once loved so much becomes a hated enemy. But the good/bad news (depending on which moment you ask me, LOL!) is that life goes on. When I found my beloved Pamela, and then we had our little girl, it made all the crap that went before worthwhile! Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
|
WhiteNite Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 241Montgomery, AL |
This is truly awesome. I wish everyone else could see it this way. I wish all love lasted forever, but it doesn't. And once it's gone there's not really a point in staying together fooling yourselves. Take some time off, and who knows, maybe you'll love again. At the very least maybe remain friends. But the longer you stay together living in torment the more you're likely to despise eachother for it, right? And the title of this one is PERFECT! Superb ending as well. Thanks for the read. "Don't let your character get camoflaged with your environment. Find who you are and let it stay in its true colors." --Rachel Joy Scott |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Troy~ Valuable wisdom to one who may need to draw from your experience. Beautifully stated poem. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
||
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
WhiteNite - WOW! Thanks for the compliments! In spite of the terrible situation, breaking up with my ex-wife was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. It's like an old pair of jeans you have worn for years - even now that they are full of holes and falling apart, it's hard to throw them away because they were comfortable for so long... Marge - I strongly wish for you not to have to go through this...but, if you do have to, I hope my poem will help you - and that you know that I am here for you, my friend! Again, thanks to everyone for reading and responding! Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
|
Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
"To try to save what's left of us, Before it is too late." Ah, Troy...(((you))) from another who has been there. You know, the more I read your poetry, the more I am convinced that you've a natural gift. Pain is often the easiest "and" the most difficult emotion to share through poetry. Those of us who find solace in our writing are fortunate, to my way of thinking. Still...there are times when even writing simply is not enough to ease the weariness and hurt. So good of you to share this piece ...with all of us. ~ Claire |
||
|
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Claire - I hope you realize how much your praise means to me! You have such talent, yourself - you're one of my favorites! And, I agree that poetry is a wonderful balm for the soul. Writing poetry is always "good therapy" for me - helps me to put things in perspective, and to find a measure of peace by expressing my feelings. Thanks for your comments, and I am truly honored that you liked this poem!Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
