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Open Poetry #7

Night on the Town

Effigy
Member

since 2000-04-11

Posts 486
disbelief

0 posted 2000-04-19 02:30 PM

I saw an old man die tonight.
His distant, hazy eyes frozen under the
florescent glow of street corner light.
A homeless man’s life he had led,
sleeping in damp alley ways
never in the comforts of a bed.
His clothes tied on with nylon bands
clutching ever so tight,
to the two dimes in his hands.
After the old man’s last breath
I heard the raven’s call
and felt the silence of death.
The old man had merely ran out of time,
it could happen to us all. So,
with little else to do, for no reason nor rhyme,
I reached deep into my pocket and
into the old man’s hand I dropped one last dime.

understanding is misunderstood

netswan
Senior Member

since 2000-03-28

Posts 1369
Washington

1 posted 2000-04-19 07:50 PM

Effigy - what a sad tale and such an
interesting ending -- Very well written.

Thanks for this interesting poem -- it
makes you think

netswan

Cerenity
Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 2637
Escondido-California

2 posted 2000-04-20 08:54 AM

Hi Effigy,

WOW this packs a punch, and sad because it happens queit often my sister witness this same thing minus the dimes and it had an affect on her for awial.
Thanks for the read, Cerenity

Effigy
Member

since 2000-04-11

Posts 486
disbelief

3 posted 2000-04-20 09:52 PM

Cerenity -

Well this didn't really happen to me, but I can see how it would leave a lasting effect on a person, if it did.

Thanks for your comments.

forne_marin
Member

since 2004-04-13

Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina

4 posted 2004-04-15 11:59 PM

It's got some nice images, but it's a little cliche. You can do better.

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