Open Poetry #7 |
I was naught |
Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
I was naught I was naught but a season of fuel for your fire naught but tinder to stoke your passions flame my kisses a fan to erotic embers my pulsing softness a spark to light your days my recesses a warm promise to take again and again in your dreams but my reasoning felt need to be heard posing questions of temporary insanity voicing the folly of my chosen path pointing out my imminent flaming demise my ego seconded the motion and put voice to my desires for more together they overrode my heart words spoken steps taken tearful endings have now rendered the path to you null and void and I will force belief that this is best as my mind does reinforce with hurt filled remembrances that my empty arms would so easily forget for betray me they would fling the door wide at your knocking and be naught for you again |
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© Copyright 2000 zoe d. - All Rights Reserved | |||
wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
i liked where this one went to teach a lesson well done |
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angelswing Senior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 705United Kingdom |
Great poem, it used a lot of my favourite metaphors such as love and flames . I liked it very much and have many of the feelings that you are describing . L.of.L. Tom . Insanity is a perfectly normal responce to an abnormal world -R.D.Laing.- |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
That one knock can instantly eradicate all the resolve forged through months of tears. For we can't deny hope that someday we'll be something to the one who is our everything. *S* Beautifully done, Corazon! |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
thanks walt...and yep, you hit it right, I did learn a lesson with this one...sometimes lessons hurt though... thank you angelswing...glad it touched you suthern, my poems do not sit well with me til I get your "read and reply"...thanks for the "well done"....means much to me you know? |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Ya mean someone pays attention to what I say? *G* Heaven help us all!!! *G* You know how it pains me to compliment you, O&O. *G* But if I had your talent, I'd be bombarding this place with poems! *G* |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
publish this! it gave me chills |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Let me say just a few words my friend...you far under estimate your talent for poetry. I have to second doreen on this one...PUBLISH!!! Not only this one though, this one and so many of your other works. Your poems don't quietly beg for attention...they stand up and shout "READ ME NOW!!!" Great poem!! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
I agree, Corazon, you do have a special gift! Very well done! Denise |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I will add my voice to those who scream "publish". Your poetry is extremely hard-hitting, real and revealing. It is hard to get enough. I was hoping it was a typo and you forgot to add the "y". NUTS! Well, maybe next time |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
well i must say I am flattered most by the quality and talent of the poets who read and comment...you make me feel good with your comments thank you so much and yep that's a definate *someday*...I will get that book on publishing and find somewhere to send and bal....lolol@forgot the "y".... |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
A fabulous style so smooth and enjoyable to read. James |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
jmlee...thank you so much, I write my poems just as is, as they tumble out of my head, I couldn't tell you why or how I choose the line breaks, they just feel right...so for you to say that makes me feel like I am doing something right |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Corazon~ Very enjoyable read. Much to like about this one for sure. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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rene Member
since 2000-04-24
Posts 113 |
you speak your mind in the most enforceful way, well done |
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