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Open Poetry #7
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My Rose
| Open Poetry #7 |
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My Rose |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again 
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My Rose Falling in love; it hurts so much. The pain just grows as you're falling apart. But how is it that it hurts even more If i never had you from the start. Does any of this mean one damn thing? Is this all just wasted time i've spent? I always trip on the line that divides who I am and who I invent. Neither one of us will let the other in too deep. Too afraid of what the other's gonna think. All this pain and failure makes me feel like I've been living a hundred years. I can't remember ever sleeping without a pillow full of tears. My soul is abused and gone; I keep coming back for more. You're the prettiest rose in the garden; And I'm bleeding from the thorns. How can wanting to give you the world be something I shouldn't feel? Are cold shoulders and dodging eyes signs of emotions not so real? You never could really look me in the eye. Cover up your lies with all my truths. Haven't you heard? Love's a two-way street. I got a feeling I'm bein' used. The past always holds the better days. Then i tripped on the feeling of being alive. i mistook you for someone who gave a damn. The good memories are struggling to survive. I was on my knees, prayin' for rain. Didn't know I'd get a storm. You're the prettiest rose in the garden; and I'm bleeding from the thorns. Maybe someplace, far from now When I don't need to remember anymore, I'll stop by and pay you a visit to pick up my heart from your bedroom floor. While I'm there, I'd also like back my intensity and my attitude. And if you're finished, I'd like my soul and all the emotions you abused. If you could just take off your armor and leave your status home for the night. See the Me you always ignore. See the Me you could learn to like. Why am I the Runner-up whenever i run your race? But play the game inside my heart and you'll always get first place. Gave you my heart but you didn't seem to know what it was for. You still the prettiest rose in the garden. And I'm still bleeding from the thorns. We all got somethin' we need to atone for. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Ethan Halo - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
i know it's long, but give it a chance, yeah? i mean, hey, at least you didn't have to type it... =) We all got somethin' we need to atone for. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Nice work Ethan_Halo!!! I would call this a nice but sad expression of feelings, from a troubled heart. I liked the last stanza... "Gave you my heart but you didn't seem to know what it was for. You still the prettiest rose in the garden. And I'm still bleeding from the thorns." regards, sudhir Take each day as it comes, Consider each day as a flight, Try hard to succeed and fly, Surely then you will reach some height. But if by some chance you don’t, Remember that tomorrow will always come. Learn this well and learn this hard That today’s efforts will pay for tomorrow’s fun. A Crazy Monster, a.k.a Ski |
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mete out Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270england |
***ethan halo, i am utterly speachless. this poem is amazing it touched me so deep down inside i'll be looking out for more of your work. oh, and brevity would not do this epic justice. I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it. |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
I really do like how you repeat stanzas for emphasis...I do that too. This was exquisite. That last stanza is beautiful sir, BTW. Laughing at you saying "at least you didn't have to type it!"  I know what you mean there! hehehe I've got some really long ones, and I too, fear that sometimes the reader gives up, and moves on. Keep writing, I'm really enjoying reading!  "Laugh and the world laughs with you..." cry, and you're all alone. My version - pFF |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
I loved your poem could feel your pain, so much emotions put into. Simply exquisite. The words seemed to dance with each other. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
I feel pain in these lines from someone who can't let go. It's powerful Kathleen [email protected] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
WOW when they're good... they arent ever long enough... this was excellent... and very well written and expressed!! so many lines impacted me... "Maybe someplace, far from now When I don't need to remember anymore, I'll stop by and pay you a visit to pick up my heart from your bedroom floor. While I'm there, I'd also like back my intensity and my attitude. And if you're finished, I'd like my soul and all the emotions you abused." wow again...and the rose and thorn metaphor...EQUISITE!! this could be a song....as I read it that was I thought maybe it was wrote as. either way....its awesome. ~as always, Take Care,JM~ -------------- I know it's been a long road To get these towns behind me and I Will gladly reap what we may sow-- I am there for you ... and you're there for me ... Are you waiting for Heart in hand Woman and man See me where I stand I am Heart Heart in hand ~vertical horizon~ |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
I'm glad y'all enjoy it and i hope you all keep readin.< !signature--> We all got somethin' we need to atone for. [This message has been edited by Ethan_Halo (edited 05-03-2000).] |
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pen of passion Member
since 1999-08-11
Posts 234 |
Ethan, I can relate here, but beyond this, it was an excellent poem. Well-written. |
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