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Open Poetry #7
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Effigy
Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486
disbelief

0 posted 2000-05-01 02:24 PM


On the couch with
my soul in my hands.
I don’t want to go outside today.
The light burns my eyes,
my skin withers and dies.

~DARKSTAR~

Eyes closed, sowing my head on straight.
I’m inside out, or is that outside in?
I’m claustrophobic of the outside world.
No, I don’t want to go outside today,
but inside this place I just can’t stay.

~DARKSTAR~

You’re wasting, I’m wasted,
on the inside, perfect outside.
I’m
burning my bridges to the floor.
To the multitudes I’ll shout,
but only on the inside reaching out.

~DARKSTAR~

Burning brightly in my eyes.
I cower among the shadows.
On the inside sweating cold.
On the outside I’m getting old.

~DARKSTAR~

I can’t go outside today!

~DARKSTAR~

It never leaves me alone!

~DARKSTAR~

Won’t let me go outside today!

~DARKSTAR~

I scream with indifference!

~DARKSTAR~

I close my eyes.


 understanding is misunderstood


© Copyright 2000 wes wiggins - All Rights Reserved
DiObear
Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 66
Switzerland
1 posted 2000-05-01 02:49 PM


Very powerful. I don't know what else I can say...

DiObear


 

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

2 posted 2000-05-01 03:59 PM


You've expressed the turmoil very well in this, Effigy. You have made me feel what it must be like to have that fear. Well done!

Denise

forne_marin
Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina
3 posted 2004-04-16 12:01 PM


"The Scream of Silence"--Okay. #1. It's a very moving piece. It evokes fear and confusion in the reader. The emotional appeal of the poem is very real. #2. What the heck are you talking about? I can't make sense of it at all. What is a Darkstar? You have your emotional punch, but past that... you can do better.
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