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Wobbly Head Bob
Member

since 2000-05-15

Posts 299
Virginia, USA

0 posted 2001-06-22 05:34 PM

Open up my eyes
So I can follow my mind
The thoughts improvised
And the words intertwined
Make for me a vision
That can turn things black
The colorful collison
And the flash beat drop back

All of this and more
Is what I want you to feel
The abstract decore
And the touching surreal
Give to me the power
To put the world on my back
To halt at zero hour
For my plan of attack

Open up your skies
So you can follow your mind
Its time to give arise
And intake undefined
Made for you a scene
That can make tears cry
The nothing in between
And the pin-point deep sky

FoxXena
Member

since 2001-06-13

Posts 141
where dragons play, children run free and foxes are never hunted

1 posted 2001-06-22 05:49 PM

Thought provoking...I like it.

*+*Would you be known by everybody? Then you know nobody.~
-Publilus Syrus*+*

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

2 posted 2001-06-22 06:04 PM

I like the title and I lvoe the poem

Maree

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

3 posted 2001-06-26 12:21 PM

Yes Awesome title man! Yea I loved this poem too. So very nicely written. A lot of emotion in this one. I loved it.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Red_Feather
Member

since 2001-01-19

Posts 131
The Vagabond Sea

4 posted 2001-06-26 11:40 PM

It's time to give rise
And intake undefined

I loved those lines. This poem seemed to come from a place of power. I like it.

One's not half two it's two are halves of one EE Cummings

2dalimit
Member Elite

since 2000-02-08

Posts 2228
Mississippi coast

5 posted 2001-06-27 06:56 AM

I too like it. Very well done.

Melton

Wobbly Head Bob
Member

since 2000-05-15

Posts 299
Virginia, USA

6 posted 2001-06-27 12:48 PM

Thanks to everyone of ya for reading a posting responces! I just really wanted to paint something no one else had seen.

Trillium

Member Patricius

since 2001-03-09

Posts 12098
Idaho, USA

7 posted 2001-06-27 03:25 PM

Very unusual and thought provoking!

Betty Lou Hebert

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

8 posted 2001-07-08 08:02 AM

You know...the title drew me in. As my mind explored the opposite of "bottom", "top"... I wondered what you would do with that, in adding the "less"...

where would you go with it, indeed?

I enjoyed this!

Inanothertime
Member

since 2001-06-29

Posts 72

9 posted 2001-07-11 08:08 AM

thanks for the journey, had a good time

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