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| How to Join | Member's Area | Private Library | Search | Sanctuary | Login | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Main Forums | Discussion | Tech Talk | Mature Content | Archives |
A home without a wall, |
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| Open Poetry #8 |
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blade |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven 
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blade a glistening blade doesn't like being cliched a whistling blade terrible shrill wrongly played a serious blade it's countenance quite staid a fierce blade no hands ever swayed a relentless blade no chance to evade a stubborn blade no way to dissuade a terse blade whose point isn't made a keen blade quickly cutting those unafraid a lonely blade like some shadows fade a lost blade without luck soon decayed a simple blade of grass now frayed Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
I loved the ending....... "a simple blade of grass........." This was thought-provoking and I enjoyed the reading......as always with your writing, my friend...... ~~~~~Live for Today~~~~~ taste every single moment |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I enjoyed this..it didn't go where I expected it to so I was pleasantly surprised.  |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Jamie, This was great. I love the end . . . quite a nice surprise. I'll never look at grass the same!!  Lone Wolf Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Sunny1, Glad you enjoyed it--I meant for it to be thought provoking so you really made my day when you said that. I was in the yard chewing on a blade of grass and all this symbolism struck me, so I had to get my pad. Thanks again. Sharon- Again, music to my humble ears. Thank you so much. Lone Wolf- Neither will I look at it quite the same-- I really have to cut it. (which i neglected to do BTW---lol) Thanks bunches. |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
You write with so many styles...I could never pick a favorite if I had to...and I don't so I guess I'm safe there This was superb, it appears that alot of work went into this, Bravo for the outcome! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Jamie, this is excellent, love the metaphors my friend! Well Done |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I enjoyed the way this was presented and loved the ending...well done! |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Ah! the pleasure of reading what you offer, your poetry is marvelous, Jamie... and chewing a blade of grass, you say huh?  regards to you "cow"boy, (sorry for the pun-fun)sudhir... |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
I like how all those verses come together with rhyme and reason....excellent work! The end was'nt what I expected but it made the whole work grow...... |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Cool!!! J - this is cool...as for that rhyming...grrr...me wanna do...lol! love the ending too... K |
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MMoonchild Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715PA |
Prometheus wonderful...I had a similar thought this spring about dandelions...it's amazing how we take so much for granted and then when I began writing I now notice everything. Dent de Lion There you were, golden maned popping up everywhere I looked as I leaned back yesterday, enjoying the warmth of an after rain. Drawing me to you, I plucked you from the meadows behind brushed you lightly against my cheek surprised at your softness, and how delicate you really were. All my life you were but a weed though cosmopolitan, and to some an herb, producing a dandy wine to drink or as is, edible to feast upon. I eyed you, held you, played with you studied your strong stem your little hairs, fine tuned breathed in scent of sweetness. Why was I so surprised... sensing your want of acceptance? Yesterday, you received mine. I kissed you with my lips and you left your tracings of gold upon them. A weed no more, I see the beauty in you. 4*2k thanks for giving me a chance to remember this one ~~softly Maureen |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
8-)---thanks everyone.. and mmoon---thanks for sharing the great poem. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
it really isn't it's hon... believe me - I know what I am blabbing about. heh doubt me all you want - you will see...you will see.. hugs  Koh - and I do like this you know..the different connections, symbolisms...very thought-provoking indeed... ...and I have found a lifetime can be lived in one moment... |
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