Dark Poetry #2 |
Android |
lotharingia Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897saarbruecken, Germany |
Cinnamon sprinkled Over sugar skin Blueberry-blue eyes Vanilla hair Spice-wine lips All mine to kiss Lotharingia "For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?" Tom Holland |
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© Copyright 2000 uta waller - All Rights Reserved | |||
Deborah1 Senior Member
since 2000-06-22
Posts 653New Hampshire |
Wonderful description here!! Short and so full, I like this alot! |
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Hardrock Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948New Hampshire, USA |
The title belies the content....sounds almost too perfect doesn't he/she? Can such perfection only be achieved in an android? Hmmmmm....makes one think. Your poems have a way of doing that. Hardrock |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
Good stuff. I think that there is such perfection in this world, and when we find it two things kind of happen. You grab a hold tight scared to lose it. Then you wait, ready for the faults that are predestined to occur. Then sometimes we sabotage it. Thanks for sharing your work. Jenn |
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demoninlove Member
since 2000-02-11
Posts 211Dehradun |
Very VERY original. That's great. Amazingly you have done it in just 6 odd lines. Deepak |
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Jeremiah Johnson Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223Brooksville, Fl, U.S |
this is great. i really enjoyed this. i like the way you put the title as is i don't think anyone person is perfect but maybe to there soulmate and thats all thanks for shareing. I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson- |
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Rex Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 482Houston, Texas |
Short and sweet Uta! Thanks. Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility. William Wordsworth |
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lotharingia Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897saarbruecken, Germany |
The original version of this poem was actually written for my husband, Monster (Sébastien really, but he prefers Monster). I was describing how I see him. It went like this: You, Beloved Cinnamon sprinkled over cotton skin sea-spray grey eyes vanilla hair wine-scented lips all mine to kiss But then I thought that with a change of title, and by making the imagery all sweet, I could hint at a future scenario, when people have become so lonely and selfish that they need tailor-made lovers. Lotharingia "For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?" Tom Holland |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~You have such an extended thought,...yes!!! Tailor made lovers,...my goodness. Is that what this world is in for? You have done well with the transition of your poem. Very interesting. *Peace. |
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