Dark Poetry #2 |
Beautiful |
a-alibaster Member
since 2000-01-08
Posts 392 |
( trying some thing a bit different for me...no rhym...so if it be aweful, please let me know?!) Beautiful He sat silently alone in the room filled with others. Head bowed as if attempting to hide within the shadows of the candles. Uttering not a sound, yet, his eyes speaking volumes. Drawn to him and his mystery as never before, my mind wandered wildly. His steal gray eyes, so enticing, seemed to silently whisper my name. So strong, yet, so frail. I became lost in his beauty. The beauty of a creature feared by those that judged far too harshly. Unforgiven in his ways and for what he is. He shivered slightly at my stare as I stepped slowly towards his side. The coolness of his skin eliminating the air and caressing my shadow gently. Taken back by this exquisite presence as my heart beat heavily within my own ears. A whisper beyond sweet compare escaped from his divine form... "I hear your willingness to feed my desires. I hear the precious blood slipping ever so gently through your longing veins. Are you willing, willing to love a creature such as I, to join me in my solitude for eternity?" With out hesitation and filled with longing beyond comprehension I became one with this beautifully misunderstood creature and drown within his arms to find passionate love within his phlebotomy Beautiful. "There is an alter ego which dwells in every soul..." a-alibaster "I am as I am, nothing more, nothing less, I am tears of pain, tears of Death. |
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© Copyright 2000 a-alibaster (H.A.R.) - All Rights Reserved | |||
DeathTrippy Junior Member
since 2000-07-15
Posts 45WY USA |
Exceptional. If this is an experiment than keep up the labwork. Don't worry about the lack of rhyme.. it gives a freedom to this work that compliments what you accomplished in writting it. |
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a-alibaster Member
since 2000-01-08
Posts 392 |
Deathtrippy, I thank you kindly for your words. I am glad that it was not a total mess!! I have always seemed to have a bit of a problem writting none-rhyme. Until...ali "There is an alter ego which dwells in every soul..." a-alibaster "I am as I am, nothing more, nothing less, I am tears of pain, tears of Death. |
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LM Senior Member
since 2000-08-03
Posts 585 |
It's not terrib;e at all, very interesting piece, it was very intriguing to read. "Are you willing, willing to love a creature such as I, to join me in my solitude for eternity?" great lines, hopefully together they wont be alone Take Care! "Most girls want a man with the mean green Don't wanna dance if he can't be Everything that I dream up A man that understands real love" |
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bluebrdy65 Member
since 2000-05-16
Posts 276Gladys, |
I don't have words to exspess the beauty in this poem. I think because there was no rhyme maybe there was more freedom to write more clearly What a wonderful poem Bluebrdy |
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Snowdwen Member
since 2000-09-16
Posts 75Louisiana |
Great! work... My faviort lines were. "I hear your willingness to feed my desires. I hear the precious blood slipping ever so gently through your longing veins. I think the lack of rhymm brout a diffrent tone.. I like it very much! Michell "You live you learn and life moves on" |
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