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bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855


0 posted 2000-06-17 09:40 PM


-contemporary prayerbook-
perfume, talk of jadescapes,
stars alight anew.
she was easy to please me absurdly
with feelings unrestrained.

love's sweatshirt smelled like holes,
even as she spoke of concrete iron.
after the last two threads broke apart,
i knew no mountain view.

little prayerbook she sent in the mail
to get me by on through.
the glossy picture leaves and poems
blinded with their hues.

every waterfall had a rainbow,
every boat a settled reflection,
every house a new england tree,
every snowscene an unlived blankness.

stapled sermon of votive candles
dripping forever frozen wax.
she wrote inside the front page,
but instead i read the back.

some mississippi mission's manipulation.
beauty through human composition.
not the actuality of god.
safe tidy faith: no dark nets allowed.


© Copyright 2000 MPC - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-06-17 11:01 PM


contemporary prayerbook-
perfume, talk of jadescapes,
stars alight anew.
she was easy to please me absurdly
with feelings unrestrained.
-----------------
little prayerbook she sent in the mail
to get me by on through.
the glossy picture leaves and poems
blinded with their hues.

every waterfall had a rainbow,
every boat a settled reflection,
every house a new england tree,
every snowscene an unlived blankness.

stapled sermon of votive candles
dripping forever frozen wax.
she wrote inside the front page,
but instead i read the back.
-----------------

I dont think I've seen this one, is it new?
its awesome either way ...

"she wrote inside the front page,
but instead i read the back"

oh man do i love that line...
and the way your poetic mind works...
ok..better go...worshiping again  
later mike gator
bs/jm

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
2 posted 2000-06-18 10:52 AM


"she wrote inside the front page,
but instead i read the back."

Wonderful Mike! I found myself reading this twice to take in all of your thoughts. Much enjoyed ... well done!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Ryan
Member
since 1999-06-10
Posts 297
Kansas
3 posted 2000-06-18 12:47 PM


This had so many wonderful lines.  I also liked the uneven rhyme scheme that wasn't too obvious.  It's always a feat to rhyme inconspicuously like you did.  Good job.

Ryan


I like too many things and get all confused and hung-up running from one falling star to another till i drop. This is the night, what it does to you. I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion.
—Jack Kerouac


SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
4 posted 2000-06-19 02:26 AM


Mike~ Gotta tell ya, even though I don't always understand, I really enjoy reading your poetry. This one is cool.   -SEA

( yes, I voted)

Live,Love,Laugh :) ~SueB


Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

5 posted 2000-06-19 02:56 PM


voting here....love this  
too many great lines to say which touch me most  

Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

6 posted 2000-06-19 02:56 PM


voting here....love this  
too many great lines to say which touch me most  

Novacaine For The Soul
Member
since 2000-05-26
Posts 122
New Orleans
7 posted 2000-06-19 07:01 PM


dear bsquirrel,
     i've always loved reading your poetry, it's so inventive and refreshing... and all of your poems, if i may say so, carry some of the most intriguing titles i've ever seen... i'll be keeping my eye out for more... especially for your older posts that i haven't read in so very long...

sincerely,
a sad tomato

you're such a beautiful freak... i wish there were more just like you...

X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon
8 posted 2000-06-19 07:49 PM


this was quite intersting, reminded me of those Sunset books we used to get as a child.

I liked this in an odd undefinable way.
~Heather

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

9 posted 2000-06-20 01:13 AM


Y'know something?  I think this poem should be incuded in our next book.  
Colin
Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596
Callington, Cornwall, England
10 posted 2000-06-20 04:19 PM


I think I'd prolly say "surreal" if I were asked to describe this  

Eric.< !signature-->

"We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka.


[This message has been edited by Eric Williams (edited 06-20-2000).]

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

11 posted 2000-06-21 01:46 AM


To everyone, thanks for your support. Now for some individual replies:

Oh crud, I can't remember everyone who wrote. Um, Butterfly Slippers, this is actually an older poem -- you must've missed it when it first came out. Novocaine for the Soul, I really appreciate your kind words, and I'm also glad you like my titles. I work at them so they're not too vague or cliche. And Eric, sure's real (surreal). Okay, that was stupid. Anybody else I forgot, forgive me. I thank you all for taking the time to read this, and to vote for me.

Mike

[This message has been edited by bsquirrel (edited 06-21-2000).]

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

12 posted 2000-06-22 08:13 AM


Oh Wonderful, Wonderful!!  

My grief lies onward and my joy behind
(Shakespeare)

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

13 posted 2000-06-24 12:08 PM


I'm glad you enjoyed, Dark Angel. Thanks.  

Mike

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2000-06-24 12:51 PM


Wonderful!!!......and......I surrender
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

15 posted 2000-06-24 06:05 PM




Mike

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

16 posted 2000-06-26 11:35 PM


By the way dark angel, I love that cityscape icon.  

Mike

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