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Open Poetry #9
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Sun O' Merlin
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Sun O' Merlin |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart 
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  Sun O' Merlin In shadowed depths dwelled the man spirit half then again mystery's chore in nevermore thus in sunlight wisdom bright caused the man to cry within "Curses" and befouled he my name took it he did in vain and cried he asunder soul then plundered tears he rendered brought none splendor In shadowed depths dwelled the man spirit half then again mystery's chore in nevermore thus in sunlight sapient bright and listened he as I spoke spirit half did not revoke the careless tongue in one so young but 'stead I waved on high wand of mystery till he sighed and aged he with whisker white rambled, ambled through long night in search of Sun sagely white for in the light man cannot hide the fool inside ©Karilea Rilling Jungel 6 August 2000 |
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| © Copyright 2000 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Sunshine, You have written a winner. It's formatted different than what I am use to, but I like it very much. And I like the words that you have written also. And the figure is equisite! |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Excellent Sunshine! Fantastic right from the title, to the figure, to the ending ... what a wonderful, enchanting read ... I loved this!  Best wishes, /Kit |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Karilea, what an enchanting spell you have cast with this poem, it makes me want to shower you with well deserved praise. In shadowed depths dwelled the man spirit half then again mystery's chore in nevermore thus in sunlight sapient bright "To the centre of the city where all roads meet, waiting for you,To the depths of the ocean where all hopes sank, searching for you," Joy divison |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Exploring the depths of enchanting growth...wonderful creation and I stand in awe once more of your limitless talent... |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Karilea~ Exquisitely complete ! 'and listened he as I spoke spirit half did not revoke the careless tongue in one so young but 'stead I waved on high wand of mystery till he sighed and aged he with whisker white rambled, ambled through long night in search of Sun sagely white for in the light man cannot hide the fool inside' There ya' go !  Love you~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
very cool Sun...mystical and magical you need but a single ray to inspire you well  excellent tale later-sunbeam-gator jm |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
In shadowed depths dwelled the man spirit half then again mystery's chore in nevermore thus in sunlight sapient bright and listened he as I spoke spirit half did not revoke the careless tongue in one so young .. .. for in the light man cannot hide the fool inside ----- Merlin, the magician of renowned fame In all his mythical glory and power, Felt useless and wasted trying to tame The dazzle of the sun's bright rays. He waved his wand, in mighty mystical motion Calling upon dark clouds to shade the sun; The dark clouds melted - force of divine rays It rained hard - washing away Merlin's prays. --------- Karilea, you dunnit again... What a pleasure it gives me to read and gain from the experience... regards, sudhir |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Wonderful, fellow K! for in the light man cannot hide the fool inside indeed indeed...I agree fully... good writing here! K"He looked across the silky surface of the Severn, and remembered that it was a famously difficult river with fierce tides..." From J |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
To have touched the man in the woman and the woman in the man pleases me much Thank you all for your kind comments... Karilea When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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