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Open Poetry #9
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Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

0 posted 2000-09-08 07:03 AM


He keeps me ticked!  

Round faced monster
Triple-handed ghost
Cyclic, tentacle-clawed,
Uniform, orchestrated
In synchronised dance
Each arm moving after
Sixty strokes by the other
At the constant rate of
A measly moment a second!

Hands moving sideways
Like a traffic policeman,
Chiding me to move
Pulling me to push
Willing me to budge
Needling my inertia
Prodding me to budge
Asking me to change
With the changing seasons!

Bejewelled marked quartz
He smiles at me wickedly
And unfailingly each hour
Sounds a blaring horn
Irritatingly persistent,
Unerringly consistent,
I don't know the 'what'
Of who keeps him in his tick
But he surely keeps me ticked!

~*~

© Copyright 2000 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
1 posted 2000-09-08 07:31 AM


Sudhir~
Oh, this is wonderful !
~*Marge*~


~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
2 posted 2000-09-08 07:33 AM


And this my friend is exactly why this cowboy does not wear a watch.  Great read my poetic genious.
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
3 posted 2000-09-08 07:36 AM


You've captured the rhythmic tick..tick..tick.. of watching time pass before us... Nice job, Sudhir..
Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
4 posted 2000-09-08 08:04 AM


Sudhir,
Loved the little time warp at the end

Be well
Kethry.

"It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures;
but it is the loss that shapes the image,
gathers the flowers weaves the garland."-

angelswing
Senior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 705
United Kingdom
5 posted 2000-09-08 08:13 AM


Very clever, Time spent wisely is your friend, but can cause much pain and anxiety, if not used to your benifit . you've done a great job with this one, give yourself a pat on the back, and spend some sweet time being proud .
L.of.L. Tom .


Don't try, do or do not, there is no try .
- Master Yoda -

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
6 posted 2000-09-08 08:16 AM


The good moments speed and the bad moments
drag....I'm going to have a talk with
someone about this    Great work Sud!!!

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
7 posted 2000-09-08 01:04 PM


Marge, wonderful suits me wonderfully well   Thanks

Mark, Thank you.. but I think you gotta have a watch to watch  

Nancy, your words mean plenty... thanks  

Kethry, glad that you liked... Thanks  

Tom, great response... Thanks   lemme be proud for some time  

butterflies... thanks a huge bunch...  

regards to all,
Sudhir

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
8 posted 2000-09-08 02:31 PM


Yeah... but you failed to mention the scream mine emits when I throw it across the room! LOL. This is great, Sudhir!  
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2000-09-08 03:00 PM


Sudhir--Love this timely piece...so cleaverly done.
Eloise
Senior Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 1096
Wyoming
10 posted 2000-09-08 05:44 PM


Excellent read Sudhir.
JnR4eva
Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377
Bronx, NY
11 posted 2000-09-08 07:30 PM


i'm loving the double meaning and the fresh concept     
for the most part i would have never thought of time in such a way, but i can nonetheless NOT disagree with you...great job sudhir  
< !signature-->

"my love is my motivation
my love is my inspiration
perception of this poem
is your interpretation"
-- rlt




[This message has been edited by JnR4eva (edited 09-08-2000).]

linda munday
Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 315
Adelaide, Australia
12 posted 2000-09-08 09:27 PM


Sudhir,
Who invented this monster anyway?
I ban the watches on the weekends, at least that way there's a short reprieve  
Linda M.

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
13 posted 2000-09-08 10:33 PM


Well done Sudhir  
Very funny and very clever indeed
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
14 posted 2000-09-08 10:37 PM


Don't get ticked off, Sudhir, just throw that baby out the window and let Time fly!

Great work, Mr. Poet  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
15 posted 2000-09-08 11:02 PM


What a most remarkable concept...what more do you have up your imaginary sleeve of tricks?

This is delightful, Sudhir...well done, good man, well done!

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
16 posted 2000-09-11 05:49 AM


Suthern, nice to see you here   Thanks

Martie, So glad that you liked this, Thanks  

Eloise, Thank you for coming by  

JnR4Eva, I think I just won a debate...   Thanks

Linda, you can keep time away for some time, but not all the time...   Thanks

Tracie, Thank you VERY much...  

Sir Balladeer, "Mr. Poet" WOW that makes be sit on the timeless cloud   ... Thanks

Karilea, it is always such a fulfilling day when I see you beaming a ray of light this way... Thank you so much, my friend...  

regards to all,
sudhir


[This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 09-11-2000).]

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
17 posted 2000-09-11 06:48 AM


"Hands moving sideways
Like a traffic policeman,
Chiding me to move
Pulling me to push
Willing me to budge
Needling my inertia
Prodding me to budge
Asking me to change
With the changing seasons!"

Oh Sudhir ... I loved this piece, forgive the pun, but it is timeless! Very cleverly penned, and such true sentiments capturing the aggravation masterfully. Well done!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
18 posted 2000-09-11 10:43 AM


Kit, Thanks a huge bunch... your words do mean a lot...

regards,
sudhir

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
19 posted 2000-09-11 11:12 AM


Sudhir...I knew I was gonna enjoy this as soon as I saw your name beside it...what a clever tale you have told...
MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
20 posted 2000-09-11 11:39 AM


I thought this wonderful, not sure  what it was going to be about..and in my mind was  contemplating many outcomes...thanks for allowing me some time out from the drudgery of real life...
~~soft smiles
Maureen

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

21 posted 2000-09-11 11:51 AM


Sorry I didn't reply sooner, but lately I just haven't had the time...

*wink*

Enjoyed this very much Sudhir...I do love your sense of humor!

ma miller
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806

22 posted 2000-09-11 02:03 PM


Sudhir, my friend ... you never cease to amaze ... this is a special one here though ... great work ...

My calling before me, let quill be my offering;
For to be called poet, no greater gift to receive.

M.A.



Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
23 posted 2000-09-11 02:28 PM


Paula, Thanks a huge deal for coming by to read...  

Maureeen, I am glad that you found some TIME-OUT...   Thanks

O Serene One, no need to be sorry about such petty reasons... come along any time you have TIME   Thanks

MA, I am delighted to see your name in the thread... Thanks  

regards to all,
sudhir

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
24 posted 2000-09-11 02:30 PM


Sudhir Iyer, don't get ticked if I haven't had time to reply lately.... but this timely piece deserves a good read. Boy time fly's when you're haveing fun.  

Parker


Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
25 posted 2000-09-12 04:09 AM


Parker, nothing to be ticked about it...
feel rather tickled that you found some time to come by...

regards,
sudhir

sweetcollege_girl
Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872
just about where I want to be
26 posted 2000-09-15 12:24 PM


I know one thing..time goes slow when you're at work!   This is a very timely piece of time Sudhir...my watch is at the house...but it ain't ticking!   Great work!  

~*~SCG~*~

"Poetry is what makes the invisible appear"-Author Unknown

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
27 posted 2000-09-15 01:35 PM


O Sweet lavada,
Thanks so much....  

regards,
sudhir

sweetcollege_girl
Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872
just about where I want to be
28 posted 2000-09-18 01:54 PM


Aw....thanks sudhir...you are a true friend! have you checked out my prose yet? Can it be expanded much more? I'm still awaiting your e-mail  

~*~SCG~*~

"Poetry is what makes the invisible appear"-Author Unknown

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
29 posted 2000-09-18 10:02 PM


Sudhir,

Not sure how I missed this one, but glad I found it!!  You have described the passage of time wonderfully my friend!!  You know, I hate my watch, but feel lost without it!!  LOL

LW


Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats

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