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Open Poetry #9
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Solitary Soul Senryu
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Solitary Soul Senryu |
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Dennis L. White Senior Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 1463Michigan, U.S.A. 
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Solitary soul A confinement, self imposed Wall around my heart No door or no key Entrance denied from within Safe inside my walls Not a risk taker Content but not contented With rejection gone .................................... This was written for my friend Kaile Moonbeams radiate When the veiling cloud has past Playful shadows dance Dennis L. White :^) |
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| © Copyright 2000 Dennis L. White - All Rights Reserved | |||
kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
Wow, the Haiku King is being depressing at long last  LOL  seriously though,i must say you have some thought-provoking lines here..."a confinement,self imposed" made me wonder what had happened to the character to make him retreat into himself....simply dig the line "content but not contented"...very clever line that makes one think now will u write a sequel? |
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Dennis L. White Senior Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 1463Michigan, U.S.A. |
A sequel you say? < !signature-->Solitary Soul Sequel Solitary soul No rejection, but no life Safe, but what's the point FEAR imprisons me Steals away precious moments Lost in lifes abyss Life is for living Wall cracks, letting in new light Dawning of new hope ..................................... Kaile, You opened the door, I just came through it! LOL Dennis :^) Moonbeams radiate When the veiling cloud has past Playful shadows dance Dennis L. White :^) [This message has been edited by Dennis L. White (edited 09-06-2000).] |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
and to think that i almost missed this sequel! thank you dennis..i loved the glimmer of hope contained within the last stanza btw,i believe the second senryu of your sequel warrants a re-post over at the corner pub...pretty sure others will love to read this depressing gem |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
No door or no key Entrance denied from within Safe inside my walls Not a risk taker Content but not contented With rejection gone =============== Solitary soul No rejection, but no life Safe, but what's the point ================== Dennis... i gotta say these are some of the best senyrus I ve ever seen ... FORGIVE ME KAILE.. but i tend to prefer them over Haikus ... as i relate to the emotions of poetry and Haikus focus on nature... as for the emotions of yours .. i was talken back by the honesty of them and the impact of their expression .. i relate to them far better than i would like to admit. well done sir .. take care jm heres my attempt at these in open 7... enjoy ... http://netpoets.com/cgi/pip/forumdisplay.cgi?action=displayarchive&number=37&topic=002149 |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
lol on Janet Marie's comments...have attempted to write a Solitary Soul haiku for u...havent indulged in this artform for ages...hope u like it Young bird trapped in shell~ Its parents killed by eagles~ Powerless orphan |
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