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Open Poetry #9
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Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263


0 posted 2000-08-19 08:15 AM



The Words I Cannot Say



In fantasy my lips are yours
no need for veil or feign
We kiss in whispered wonder
your embrace is my domain

The world is ours for painting
in my scenes of reverie
a fresh and freeing canvas
Though I know it cannot be
  
As I harbor my reflections
and keep them from your ear
I shan't reveal the truth within
these thoughts you'll never hear

A saddened searching melody
a voice of promise past
reverberates within my heart
though silent song is cast

As distant tenor serenades
in dungeon dark I'll lay
Alone I'll sleep in tangled sheets of
the words I cannot say

For this burden tethered to my soul
has seen its darkest day
as I find myself imprisoned by
the words I cannot say




© Copyright 2000 Meadowmuse - All Rights Reserved
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
1 posted 2000-08-19 08:21 AM


Claire,
You may not be able to say them, but you can sure write them down.
This is exquisitely written
You have no end of words, my dear
Just keep them coming
Liz

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
2 posted 2000-08-19 09:22 AM


The ache and longing in this piece are so vivid...to have the feelings but not share the words...you have penned the turmoil of the heart so well.  Wonderful writing~
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 2000-08-19 09:25 AM


Claire, it's always a treat to read your poetry. And this is no exception! It's wonderful.  
Fred Hobbs
Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 329
Tallahassee, Florida, US
4 posted 2000-08-19 09:41 AM


Claire,
No one's ever said it better.  Excellent work.   fh

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
5 posted 2000-08-19 09:42 AM


Oh Claire ... this is exquisite!  Such a beautiful flow lined with desire and an aching longing to speak the words aloud. Wonderful!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374

6 posted 2000-08-19 10:04 AM


Wonderful!  "though silent song is cast" really caught my eye.  I like this line very much.

-jaimie
www.ladysixstring.com



Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2000-08-19 10:56 AM


Claire,
       it is my fervent hope that one day, you will find one to speak your soft and tender words to. . .

This is just beautiful my friend. . . just beautiful. . .

-----------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
8 posted 2000-08-19 11:01 AM


Hello Meadowmuse,
I also have to say that you may not be able to say them, but geez, you sure can write them down.


brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2000-08-19 11:25 AM


Claire this is stunning absolutely stunning from the first word to the last a masterpiece.

"Beyond all this good is the terror,The grip of a mercenary hand,When savagery turns all good reason, There's no turning back, no last stand,"I.Curtis

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
10 posted 2000-08-19 11:46 AM


Claire,
This is exceptional work...
leaves me in utter amazement...

regards,
sudhir

Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
11 posted 2000-08-19 01:15 PM


For not being able to say the words, you sure can share your pain.

Elizabeth

Why ME???

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

12 posted 2000-08-19 01:22 PM


C,
this is just truly an exceptional piece of work....
I am just so taken with this poem...
and my words wont do it justice...
You have such an amazing muse my dear poet...
and I have SUCH poet envy  
take care gentle poet
jm


There are places inside our souls -
that have never been touched.
There are places inside our hearts -
that need to be loved this much.
~jm~


Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
13 posted 2000-08-19 01:29 PM


I adored the first two lines of this.  Haunting in it's longing, wonderful piece!

Corinne

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
14 posted 2000-08-19 04:59 PM


Easier to pen than to say and you have penned them masterfully.  Beautiful piece of saddness.  
Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
15 posted 2000-08-19 05:04 PM


This just hurts from beginning to end...to love and not be able to tell them...I dont think anything is more painful than that
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
16 posted 2000-08-19 05:11 PM


Claire...sometimes those unsaid words hurt worse than any we could ever voice. I love the lines "in dungeon dark I'll lay
Alone I'll sleep in tangled sheets of
the words I cannot say"
Nice writing  

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
17 posted 2000-08-19 05:18 PM


"Alone I'll sleep in the tangled sheets
of the words I cannot write."
Yes Claire those words did it for me.
I am in poetic heaven...thanks for writing such beautiful words for me to read and enjoy...James

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

18 posted 2000-08-19 05:21 PM


Liz, I thank you. I was just thinking how "you" seem to have no end to your lovely poems...and considering myself fortunate to be able to read your works almost daily.

Butterflies, "turmoil of the heart" seems to have followed me around for some time. Thank you for reading this painful piece and seeing some beauty in it.

Miss Poet, thank you for your "wonderful" and the smile.  

Fred, hello to you. Long time no see... thanks for reading and for your kind commentary.

Kit, I'm glad you enjoyed reading it. Your words are always so encouraging...thank you sincerely.

ladysixstring, Hello and Welcome to Passions ~ Thank you for letting me know you enjoyed reading. I love it when folks share their favorite lines with me, as I like to do the same.    

Bill, you always say the nicest things...even your "geeze" is sweet.   Thank you.

~ Claire



Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

19 posted 2000-08-19 10:35 PM


Brian, a masterpiece? Not exactly, but I do thank you for being so kind and generous with your words tonight.

Sudhir, if you enjoyed this, then I am pleased. Thank you, my friend.

Elizabeth, thank you for reading and letting me know that you found something to enjoy here. I appreciate the positive note.

Janet, my muse is rather moody of late, truth be told...but I'm trying. Thanks so much.

Corinne, thank you...I had to go back up and look at the first two lines to refresh my memory     So nice of you to let me know that you read and enjoyed this.

Mark, there is sometimes beauty in sadness, I suppose...I thank you for finding some in this.

Paula, indeed, a difficult state. Thank you for taking time to read.

Ruth, thank you for the nod of approval. Yes, so often the unsaid words are the most torturous.

James, your sweetness pervades even your responses here. Thank you for reading, and for such a "heavenly" reply.

~ Claire




Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Auguste
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
20 posted 2000-08-19 11:40 PM


Claire,

This is pretty and somewhat unlike your usual poetry.  Some words are better left unsaid...that's quite true.

Your friend,
Michael





Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
21 posted 2000-08-19 11:58 PM


Claire..Sometimes the words you cannot say speak the loudest to the heart...thanks for sharing your's here in this beautifully written sigh.
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
22 posted 2000-08-20 12:12 PM


Again, this is wonderful writing from your pen, Claire
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

23 posted 2000-08-20 12:31 PM


Always a pleasure to read your poems, Claire, the lighthearted and the sad ones. They are all so beautifully done.

Denise

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
24 posted 2000-08-20 01:04 AM


can i echo again the last time i responded to one of your romantic pieces? ... writing romantic poetry is not easy... especially when you want to create something special and not cliche... you have become a master at this and i applaud you! your command of the language is awesome... as is this piece... as are you... as a writer and a wonderful person... thank you for a special read  

~ all you can really ever expect out of life is a good apology and some decent poetry ~

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
25 posted 2000-08-20 01:26 AM


Claire~
With softness of pen you create a mood ...
this is exceptionally tender.
~*Marge*~


~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
26 posted 2000-08-20 01:27 AM


All I can do is stand in awe of such fabulous work!

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Unknown



Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

27 posted 2000-08-20 09:41 AM


Michael, yes, it is a bit different for me...but some feelings require different sorts of expression, I believe, and I am still struggling to do so. Thank you, my friend.

Martie, your gracious words make sharing "this beautifully written sigh" so gratifying to me...thank you for being so kind.

Balladeer, sincere thanks to you.

Denise, I don't know how you do it, but you manage to read nearly every poem here, I believe, and with always an encouraging note left for the writer. What a blessing we have in you.

Doreen, I again read your words with humble appreciation. Thank you, in earnest, for all you have said. I only hope that I might live up to your most generous perception.

Marge, you always see the tenderness, my friend...thank you.

Eagle One, thank you for reading, and for taking a moment to let me know that you've enjoyed this. Now, please sit and be comfortable.  

~ Claire



Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
28 posted 2000-08-20 09:50 AM


Aw the beauty of poetry......releasing the frustrations of untouchable love in such wonderful flowing lines and verses...what a marvelous job you have done here expressing the hurt harboured in the heart.
Mike
Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462

29 posted 2000-08-25 12:04 PM


Not sure how I missed this exquisite penning.
What a pleasure to experience.

Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
30 posted 2000-08-25 01:10 AM


Such deep, poignant sorrow Claire.  Magnificent writing, as always.  You are my poetic idol and you never ever dissapoint me.  

*Krista Knutson*

"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back."
-Barbara DeAngelis

JnR4eva
Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377
Bronx, NY
31 posted 2000-08-25 01:16 AM


wow ...truly wonderful is this poem and im glad that someone bumped it up for that i can be able to see for myself  
i posted a poem along these lines, of having that inability to express that love..but mine was of a poet to his love...i think your poem is much more tragic and better at expressing these thoughts of having that inability   ...truly great  
< !signature-->

"my love is my motivation
my love is my inspiration
perception of this poem
is your interpretation"
-- me




[This message has been edited by JnR4eva (edited 08-25-2000).]

Silkdragon
Member
since 2000-06-24
Posts 65

32 posted 2000-08-25 01:16 AM


Meadowmuse:

Um, I am quite literally speachless.  This was absolutely stunning.  It's the first of your work I've read, and it makes me want to go and delete all of my posts in poetry.  *hangs head in shame*  I can see why you're krista's idol....  Beautiful!

Erin

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

33 posted 2000-08-25 09:42 AM


ethome, so often that harboured hurt remains undefined, to my way of thinking. Poetry allows one to express some of that, at least in words, or perhaps simple syllables of suffering. Either way, I thank you for letting me know that you read and enjoyed.  

Mike, your poetic pleasure is my treasure.  

JnR4eva, thank you for such a generous response. Yes, I read your poem and it is positively superb!  

Silkdragon... Erin, don't ever delete or destroy your work because of something you've read. I'm sure you were joking about this, but I believe strongly in the validity and beauty of all poetic voice. Be proud of your creativity and desire for self~expression as, after all, that is what best defines us as  writers, thinkers, creators. Keep writing and sharing! Thanks sincerely for letting me know you enjoyed reading.  

~ Claire

  








Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
34 posted 2000-08-25 10:43 AM


As I've said in re's elsewhere - I sometimes read and respond because I see someone has recieved few responses, sometimes because the title intrigues me, other times like this one, because the author recieved many responses - - I'll simply say this time - you spoke for me - and most beautifully - most beautifully!


Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
35 posted 2000-08-25 11:16 AM


Claire, another beautiful poem, your a wonder. You play that pen in perfect harmony's and are always a joy to read.  

Parker

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